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support when you are a carer who is deaf and dealing with a terminal diagnosis

Posted by

Hi. My dad has just had an operation but the prognosis is at best six months. My mom is profoundly deaf and will be the carer. Has anyone had a similar scenario and/or can anyone advise what help she can get woth caring for him? Thank you 

Posted by


Welcome to the online community and I'm sorry to hear about dad and the added problems with your mum trying to be dads carer, you should be aware that caring for someone is very tiring and hard work and if you can keep an eye on mum to make sure she is not over stretching herself.

You are perfectly correct when you say none of us wants to be in this position and when it comes to our door we struggle to find help. The good news help is available but you need to know where to start and I hope the following will be the start you need

Instead of printing out lots of information for you below you will find links to people that you need to contact and what they do.


You should contact the family GP and keep him in the loop, the GP should arrange all medical care that your dad needs (GP visits, district nurses etc) 

TIP keep a diary of visits by GP and all medical professionals just in case something goes wrong and you need to "remind" the GP! if your dad is kept waiting for help from himself or the nurses.

From Macmillan library 

Sign up for Macmillans help

Information on questions to ask healthcare team

Guide on questions to ask Healthcare team 

Getting help

Your Dad and mum should have a needs assessment

What is a needs assessment

Your mum should have a  Carers assessment 

Both of the above are carried out by your council's Adult Social Team and can be done at the same time or independently.


In England and Wales, Find my council

In Scotland, Info Scotland  Find my Council

In Northern Ireland,Find my social care 

If you’re unable to contact social services, someone else can contact them on your behalf. This could be a family member or friend, or a health or social care professional involved in your care, such as your GP or hospital social worker.

If you need help


Telephone  0800 055 66112

AGE UK are always a good source of help and information and have trained volunteers that can telp with paperwork to access benefits.


Attendance allowance is not charity it's an entitlement 

If your dad is not already getting Attendance Allowance he should apply as soon as possible, if he is already getting it make sure he is on the correct rate

How to claim

Use the Attendance allowance  claim form to apply by post. The form comes with notes telling you how to fill it in.

Send the completed form to:

Attendance Allowance Unit

Mail Handling Site A


WV98 2AD

Call the Attendance Allowance helpline to ask for:

a copy of the form

alternative formats, such as braille, large print or audio CD.

Attendance Allowance helpline

Telephone: 0800 731 0122

Textphone: 0800 731 0317

NGT text relay (if you cannot hear or speak on the phone): 18001 then 0800 731 0122

Monday to Friday, 8am to 6pm

If you’re deaf and use British Sign Language (BSL) you may be able to use the Video Relay Service

Check that you can use the service first

It is advisable to get someone to help with filling in the forms Macmillans, AgeUK and Citizens Advice (CA) all can help and they are used to completing them. 

I hope that this is of interest to you if you need anything further please give me a shout or speak to one of our friendly advisers who man the telephone support line on 0808 808 0000 they are available 7 days a week between 8 am and  8 pm.


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