Feeling low

Hello, I am so sorry to hear you're feeling like this. Not that it makes things any easier right now you certainly aren't alone or should feel bad or guilty having these thoughts and feelings.

My wife has a life shortening brain tumour. We don't know how long she has but it is not fixable, time is all we have right now. We have a 10 and 8 year old.

My wife is so strong and is the most amazing person, I wish I could take it away and make things better but I know that isn't possible but I just feel helpless in this situation.

I feel so angry about the situation. I struggle with anxiety and have done for as long as I can remember. I am so fearful for the future not just for my wife but so too my children. Seeing them day to day, knowing everyone's life is going to come crashing down at some point is so painful.

I find when I try and suppress my feelings it just amplifies things further. My relationship with my wider family is non existent in terms of being able to emotionally connect and be able to talk to them about how I am feeling, so I feel totally alone, but then I feel guilty as it isn't me who is dying.

I am new to this community this is my first post but after reading the comments on forums I am a little more hopeful in being able to overcome this feeling of isolation even slightly 

It's a shit situation. There are no easy answers - and I am definitely not trying to offer any 'advice' here. But I simply suggest that you try to value and appreciate what you currently have, while you still have it.

I hope that doesn't sound trite. But life is short, and can be cruel. And all we ever really have is what we are currently blessed with.

Best wishes to you all.

Hi. I'm so sorry you are going through this. My partner of 16 years was told she was in remission in December 2023. We have 4 good weeks and she was then told she had incurable metastatic bowel cancer in the lungs with a 2 year prognosis. I'm a bit old fashioned and didn't speak much about it, bottling everything up whilst trying to be "strong".I was all over the place, frequently upset but only on my own. My partner has responded reasonably well to treatment and is still here almost 2 years on and actually doing ok. I'd never have thought it, but one thing that worked for me was a ten minute breathing meditation each day. It cal.ed me down significantly. I'm usually very cynical about all of that but I can say it has helped me ro cope. Not for everyone, I know but ai did it out of desperation and it was positive. I think you do eventually learn to appreciate the good times in the time that you have. I'd try not to be too hard on yourself. 

Best wishes to you both.