Hello,
I am new to this but thought it might be a place to find others who can relate and understand.
My auntie became unwell last year, she had a surgery for something in July and during that, a biopsy was taken as they saw something suspicious. Because of where she had the surgery, she was unable to sit up so aside from going to the toilet and getting a drink from the kitchen she was bed bound. In October she was told the biopsy showed cancer cells but it was likely stage 2/curative. In December to Feb she had radiotherapy. After that she had a few weeks where she was getting back on her feet, able to sit up for an hour or two at a time and gaining independence back. Then the pain started again and very quickly she became bed bound again. April/may she had more scans which showed cancer was still there and there was surgery or chemo she could have but then they decided she wasn’t well enough for surgery so they were going to do chemo which wasn’t curative but hopefully manage things to then be able to have the surgery or at least buy her some time. She had the first lot of chemo in June and it made her very unwell, we had to call the Christie hotline and she spent a week in hospital as all her blood work wasn’t right. All the while her appetite was terrible, she was getting weaker, about a month ago she became fully bed bound she couldn’t even stand due to pain. She was due to have second lot of chemo tomorrow but was told on Friday, if she had it she’d be dead by Friday. They’ve now said there isn’t anything they can do. I live with her and have been her carer throughout this while also working full time night shifts in a care home. I am exhausted, heartbroken, feeling guilty, scared. We don’t know how long she’s got left, she isn’t eating anything now, just aymes shakes twice a day. They are planning to put things in place this week such as a dnar and discuss carers coming in and hospice place when the time comes. I just hate that we thought she’d get through this and I’ve watched her get so poorly and now wonder things like, if I’d have encouraged her to eat more before maybe she’d have been strong enough to have the chemo etc. she’s very stubborn and I know she wouldn’t and that probably wouldn’t have changed this outcome but I just can’t help thinking along those lines. It feels weird almost grieving someone who’s still here.
thank you for reading
