Hi everyone .I was wondering if you could give some advise please .My Mums been diagnosed with ovarian cancer .She as rapidly gone down hill over the last two to three months and has been given up to 6 to 9 months to live .My mum is currently in hospital but a care package is being put into place to help her as she lives on her own and very independent and she won’t come to stay with us .I can’t begin to think how my mum is feeling .I am my Mums main carer.I am so scared about the future … I don’t want to see my Mum suffer .How does everyone cope with caring for a love one who is dying , work and childcare please ?x
Hi Scaggles
Sorry to hear about your mum though it does sound positive that she is getting a care package to support her in the way she wants.
If we look at Your feelings when someone has cancer I am sure you will recognize quite a lot of things we all have in common. I know I often found work, where I felt life was a bit more normal and I have more control was perhaps the easiest part of the day.
One of the potential drawbacks of a prognosis is it can feel a bit like a ticking bomb, it is worth reflecting it is at best an educated guess - my wife never wanted one and I struggled with that but it turns out it was probably the best option ever.
I did a living with less stress course that really helped me. Chief was the idea of focusing on the here and now rather than problems that could happen in the future - my imagination really ran riot and it stopped me appreciating where we have. Often on here we talk of pre-grief.
The oncology team and the carers should be able to make your mum as comfortable as possible and by listening to and talking sometimes we can make some good memories and look back too on how she raised you.
<<hugs>>
Steve
