My mum has just been diagnosed with lung cancer that has spread to her liver and brain. She has had bleeds from the brain tumour. We are awaiting results from her biopsy to determine what type of cancer it is, so they can decide what treatment is best. She lives on her own and was really independent before all of this kicked off. Although there were a few things that I had started to wonder about and had initially thought it was her hearing or dementia. It's completely knocked me for six. She isn't really aware of what is going on. She is very able, i.e.can get dressed etc, but she doesn't retain any Info.
I know it's probably a bit too early to ask, until we have a treatment plan, but for others in a similar situation, what kind of needs did the person you are caring for require. How quickly did that change.
I am concerned that if she goes home ( she lives alone) that because she has issues with her memory, she will be at risk and a danger.
Just looking for others experiences as I feel utterly lost.
Hello Blu boy, sorry you have found yourself here too, it's not where we want to be, but it's full of advice and people in similar situations.
My mum too was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer, mets to liver, bones, lymph nodes and adrenal glands in Dec, had 4 cycles of chemo, and immunotherapy for around 10 months, did really well, but now we have progression and immuno stopped working. So back to 2nd line chemo, but this time we too have brain mets, 7 of them.
I don't live local to my parents, but go home every weekend, have done since Dec. My mum was my dad's carer and now roles have been reversed.
My mum is nearly 70, so fit, but chemo knocked her down and made her very week for about 5 days each cycle, it was more so as she was given injections for 5 days to help fight infection, these gave her lots of bone pain, but after those days, she was better. My dad had to cook etc as mum didn't have the energy. I batch cooked and still do now for them, takes a little pressure away from them and i know they will eat.
If it were my mum alone,I would try to stay with her if possible, and if she was happy for this too. Even if it was for a week after treatment, just to help through what might be a little tough for them, mum was a little emotional which is understandable.I'm not sure of your circumstances.
I think once you have a treatment plan, things will fall in place, and take one day at a time, thst's all we do. For me, the brain mets feel like a game changer and radiation has been discussed, but nothing given yet due to her oncologist wanting to see how the new chemo is going. So i have no experience with this but know some people have fatigue, sickness and lose hair, whilst others have a more difficult ride. Everyone is different and we don't know how well treatment will be tolerated until it starts.
Those early days are awful, you are in limbo with it all. I remember them so well. Once mum started treatment, it all felt better, as silly as that sounds. I cried so much, the fear created so much anxiety but that all settled. Be kind and gentle on yourself too, it's an emotional time and i felt it hard personally as i have become my parents carer now as much as i can. I have also had talks with my HR/manager about going home to work from my parents house if needed as i am still WFH, and this is ok, we also discussed a career break for if and when things start declining, i needed my own clarity that i could be there for my parents.
I hope i haven't depressed you 
just wanted to share my experience. One thing i will say is, I never, ever thought my mum would be this strong!!! She has amazed me so much and i can't describe how this makes me feel. A true warrior!
Always here to talk/for support, it's important for us too.
Hope you get your mums results soon and a plan is put together for her. More importantly, i hope your mum does well and has positive results 
