Crying

We do have a few recipes. We go for old fashioned stuff.

I bake irish bread and make biscuits (when I'm not crying :) )

But simple is always best!

Hi, I feel your pain. My eldest daughter(48) has been told her brain cancer has grown and is now terminal. She has to decide whether to start chemo or not. She has just had the worst 6 weeks of her life as she got pneumonia, started having seizures and developed steroid induced diabetes. She may have about 2 months left without the horrors of chemo and they can’t tell her if it will work or not. . 

I keep crying. I am her mother and cant kiss it away as I used to with bumps and scrapes when she was little. To make it worse I live 70+ miles away from her. I cannot physically or financially keep driving to see her. 

Crying is, I believe, natural and a way to release tension. Without it we would go mad. So keep crying . Good luck. Xx

I don't know what to say. I gave a daughter the same age and truly do feel your pain. To know that you cannot make your child better must be the worst thing to go through. I can't make my partner better and he us facing the last weeks maybe even days of his life and that's hard enough. Where in the world is there any justice in what you are g oing through

On the issue of chemo or not, you know it will be her decision. Also hard. You want to believe it will work. I was very optimistic only to be devastated when told in January that it hadn't. I think I would have chosen a better quality if life for a shorter time with hindsight. 

Where in the country are you both.  Does your daughter have children.

I wish I could help you but my heart goes out yo you.

Love Jan xxx

Thank you for your kind words. 

My daughter has 2 sons, the oldest is at university and has Aspergers and the younger has just dropped out of sixth form and has Acute Anxiety Disorder. He has become the wild child, unfortunately. She and her husband separated 2 years ago. 

She is in Surrey, near Staines on Thames and I am on the Buckinghamshire/Oxfordshire/Northamptonshire borders..4 miles from Silverstone! 

I have a feeling she will not go for Chemo. Radiotherapy caused enough problems. 

I admit to even crying in my sleep, when I manage to sleep. I rail at the world and life but it does no good. I have been known to stand in my garden and scream at the sky, but it changes nothing. I wish it did. 

My father, many years ago, was diagnosed with prostate cancer and given 6 months to live. He died just over 5 years later. I know science has moved on since then but it does give me a little hope. 

My brother also has prostate cancer and has been living with it for 15 years! He is now 81 and it has just started to cause him some grief. He has had to give up playing bowls he tells me, but he still looks after his teenage grandsons at weekends and school holidays. We are a tough bunch. I hope my daughter has inherited my family genes. 

The first thing I notice is the time of your post! Like me you don't seem to get a lot of sleep. 

I lost my husband to leukaemia 12 years ago and that was a shock because he had never been I'll in his life. His illness was short and didn't give me much time to prepare for life without him. I thought I would never get over it but I did to a degree and after 3 years met a wonderful man who us my current partner. We have been together for 9 years, but cruelly that is do on to end.he has been battling cancer for 3 years and now is probs my I  his last week. He hasn't eaten anything for 4 weeks. Why does it always happen to the best. He has given me probably the best years of my life but I'm not sure I knew that until now. He has never done anyone any harm.i think I am in a bubble at the moment and can't quite believe it's happening. I still pray for a miracle.  I live in Dorset and am fortunate enough to be able to walk to the sea every evening and marvel at the wonder of nature. But although it's a beautiful world we live in, it's a cruel world too. 

We are tested in so many ways. Our strength stretched to the limits. 

My children are 47 and 44 and both have families giving me 5 wonderful grandchildren. Sadly my partner has no family.  They are everything to me and I can't even comprehend being where you are right now. All you can do is be there for them all, they will need you to be strong but that's so much easier said than done.

Let me know how things progress for you. I think it helps to share if you can and especially so to done one who us going through something similar. Know  you are never alone. 

Love and hugs to you and your daughter

Xxxxx