THE ORIGINAL GANG OF MUSHROOM ROPE BUILDERS (i.e Mel & Em's thread cont...)
FormerMember
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This is the start of a new journey for me and my much loved friends from the original Oesophegus thread on general discussions.
We have become a close group and this will be our new home to continue our journey as life has become very hard for many of us and we keep re-living our journeys with lots of newbies which puts us all back a bit.
So my lovely friends Mel, Sam, Helen, Bern, Jac, Nic, Dawn, Sue, Cath, Lesley, Jani and the many other special friends Mel and I have made over the last 16 months this is it we have a new home.
Love to all and extra strength to carry us through our next stage XXX
FormerMember
Heellooooooo,
almost lunchtime, so am allowed. ha ha
Nic - yippeee hols. Feels like I need another one after all the hard work I have done today!!! when you off?
Sam - yep, you just had to wave the bottle round, but you may have blwon the ruse now!!
Sam & nic - a friend of mine is living at my dads flat and I have to say I don't really like going round there. I need to, as need to make sure they haven't put big holes in the wall and the like. He used to invite me round for dinner, but couldn't relax and never went. If he was out though, then I could chill. Took me a while to get to that stage and Im still not keen on going there!! Think its healing to go round though. Hard as confronting, just got to be done.
Mel - today, can you please buy the winning lottery ticket? Thinking of you honey
Barbie - your mail the other day almost made me spit my drink out on the pc, as you made me laugh so much!! So tip to myself, is don't eat or drink whilst reading your mails!!
SAM - ooooo loads of wedding planners here to help. Did mine in a fortnight and it was fab - well I am biased. ha ha. I'm sure with all the brains here there will be loads of tips to cut corners, which doesn't mean quality just the cost.
Em - hope your laptop is on something other than directly on your lap? You booked your next holiday yet?
Jac - sending you oodles of hugs. I will fly over with the pink lady and we can make you chicken soup. or thai chicken curry? Do you like chicken that way?!! Champagne or Pimms what would you like to drink? Will mail you I promise. Hang in there sweetheart. YOU are SUPER and you know we are all here for you. I know it doesn't make things better or change the shite that is happening. I just hope you don't feel so alone and it lifts your heart. X
Cath - where you gone to? Have you run away with Dawn & lesley? Can we come and play too???
Right off for a swim. Then a jog tonight. Hands up those doing the run.....ok Sam and Em...are some of you hiding? Ahhh Heidi I see you there, behind Sue and Rach. How about we all wear a pink tutu skirt? Come on be fun and I may as well look silly, cause by end of the run my face will be looking like a raspberry!! What do you say? Come on.......Barbie, get your whip out and whip them into shape!!!
Is it a coldness?? or a protection?? i think it is a protection, we stay cold on the outside just in case someone gets to close to hurt us again, i think it is also a way of coping and gradually we may warm up through time.
Don't worry, i think we just ACT cold and some times negative in my case, to protect ourselves, we all know how much we love others, and that is why we chill a bit, because we hate the thought of having to go through this shite with another loved one, but if & when it happens we will hurt just as much and the chill will melt.
really busy at work, got a big event coming up so manic and not much chance for a sneaky post in work and then been busy every night this week!
hope all are ok. i'm not bad, but it really is getting to anniversary time for me. This time last year we were waiting for dad to get his results back. Thinking about him a lot at the moment. Particularly with my little boy playing footie - scored his first goal in the first match of their summer league last night. Dad would have been on the sidelines cheering him on. Hope he's watching from somewhere and smiling!
anyway love as always to you all, never far from my thoughts even when i'm not here playing!
Nic, Em, I know that I'm no expert at this but I feel that I need everybit of concentration to get through each day ok. Anything extra on top of this is to much of a drain on my emotional resources. I haven't got the energy to think more than one step ahead, and I have had to put myself in the front row in order of priority.
It's a big change for me, as normally everyone else comes first, but to survive each day I have to put myself first, and this has come as a surprise to some that are expecting the old Mel. I don't think it's cold, I think it's self preservation.
I kind of look at as a bit of a deal with those closest to me. The deal is that I will get through each day in some form of normality, and carry out all the normal everyday duties and routines, BUT, do not ask anything extra of me, do not make any demands on my emotions, agree with me on EVERYTHING, and all will be ok. Simple !
It's a huge thing that has happened, and huge things need to be adapted to.
Hmmmmm seems like im not posting much but real busy at work like Cath. Hope everyone is ok, i'm fine, well ok really, coming up to the first anniversary of Vince's passing next month which is kinda weird like another lifetime ago??
Any how, i'll try and pop in later if i can and check up on you all take care, love Dawn xxx
p.s. ohhhhh im first postie again! Mwoahhhh love to you all xxxxxxx
Hmmmmm seems like im not posting much but real busy at work like Cath. Hope everyone is ok, i'm fine, well ok really, coming up to the first anniversary of Vince's passing next month which is kinda weird like another lifetime ago??
Any how, i'll try and pop in later if i can and check up on you all take care, love Dawn xxx
p.s. ohhhhh im first postie again! Mwoahhhh love to you all xxxxxxx
Just wanted to say hello and let you all know that i'm sorry I have been down the last few days but it was the anniversary of losing my fist baby and although it was 12 years ago it still hurts even now.
Well the sis-in-law has decided a trip to blackpool for hen night yeah I know tacky but we all are typical stay at home with a bottle posh birds ha ha so need to do something a bit more out there!!!! So 12th July will be get sloshed weekend and seen as it's the day after Dad's year anniversary I will be needing to drink ha ha.
