THE ORIGINAL GANG OF MUSHROOM ROPE BUILDERS (i.e Mel & Em's thread cont...)

I don't know what to do Mel. My sister in law has already offered to go but dad said he would be fine just him and mom. If I offer he will wonder why we're asking to go with him as he's already fearing the worst believing they've turned the scan reading around quickly.

I have a big event on at work that I'm facilitating and it involves 15 people so it's too late to cancel. I just don't know what to do for the best now. I said to mom today she must call me the minute she knows anything as I won't be able to concentrate anyway. Fortunately it's a morning appointment. I have to admit that a part of me doesn't want to go either because I'm scared and I don't want to see dad upset. That's not much help is it and I feel so very guilty about that.

I'm ashamed to say that it was my sis in law who chased the appointment so dad called and thanked her for following it up. I feel I should have had the brains to do that. I'm feeling a bit of spare part. I was going to go over to dad's on Wednesday to see how he is and offer my support. It's tricky because he doesn't like talking about it much.

I've mentioned the sis in law part before and she's placed herself at the top of the helpful tree (she has been good) but seems to forget that it was her who talked me out of going to the appointments. I'm scared for what the future holds and with a career and young daughter I won't be able to compete with her as she keeps a vigil. Not that I'm saying my job comes first by any stretch. The time will be right to call a day at work I know that - she will do it regardless of the time being right as she's very much into what people think. I know I sound horrendous - I need someone to give me a good talking to. I should be grateful but she's made me feel very pushed out at times. I'm feeling lost and a vile person.

K

Kelsey,

Please don't feel like that, it is your wonderful Dad and no matter how amazing your sister in law is, you are his daughter.

It such a difficult place to be, I remember the pull of responsibilities, and the complete lack of inderstanding that sometimes everything cannot be dropped. My sister in law was expressing how she was feeling this way to me this morning.

One of her relatives has not got much longer, and responsibilities have fallen to my Husband and she feels like a third wheel. When it comes down to it, we all do the best we can.

Do what needs to be done on Thursday, and bite your nails while waiting for the call. If your sister in law is going, use her as your pa, and ensure that any questions that you may have are asked and answered. Please please please let us all know as soon as you can. We will be sending you all our courage and strength.

Love

Mel X

Morning Everyone,

Kel, I'm thinking of you at this tough time. I can honestly say I would'nt want to go back to where you are right now if there is anything I can help with you know where I am.

Mel, It may seem strange but I am glad that the grief has started to show more as I was really worried you where going to go under with the amount of pressure you were putting yourself under to COPE!!! This you have now is all normal and I can honestly say time does'nt heal but it becomes a little easier to bear and we get fewer heart wrenching days.

Right big thank you's to everyone here is my update;

The Dr called last night and said my Nuetrophil levels have raised from 0.8 to 2.1 so she is very happy with this. I now have to wait for a date for an ultrasound scan to check if the spleen has come back down and a haematology appoitment to look into my blood problems!!! they are also waiting for the viral screen they did to come back as they said it must have been one hell of a virus to do this to my body mmmmm not sure how I missed it then ha ha.
So me and the hubs are a little less scared right now although the next battle is making sure the spleen is'nt still enlarged or this will have it's own amounts of stress to go with it.
Thanks again everyone.

Mel, any ideas what a normal neutrophill level is???

Emx

Mel, forgot to add, I hope the house is getting under control and your Dad has settled down. (((((((((((((((huge hugs))))))))))))))))))))

to all...me guesses you need them....

Hi Em,

Glad that it's now on the increase, that's such a good sign.

A normal level is between 1500 and 8000, so the figure you have must have been done as a percentage of blood analysed. On the report it will say the normal range for theie fluid ratio by one of these next to it. If you give me that number, I can tell you have far off you are.

They know all about your gall bladder op don't they Em? Never presume that it's in the notes so they must have read it, or that if you told one doctor he told another. It's a strong posibility that some wayward crystals caused this, did you have any pain in your kidneys? or those type of symtoms.

Have they asked you to increase your fluid intake?

Big hugs

X

Oh and watch out for the biggest rant you have ever seen on Mac.

My Mum and all her brothers and sisters have a life insurance policy that my Grandad took out on them when they were children.

My Grandad was a train driver and it was a option given to all staff as a bonus. It doesn't pay out a huge amount, as my uncle passed away a few years ago and his wife got £1000. We sent off Mum's because Dad wants to put the money towards a bench at the cemetery.

The letter came through, but they are not aware that we already know that the policy should pay out minium £1000. They have calculated Mums life's worth as £4.50.

Yes £4.50 the spot is not in the wrong place.

In the letter they state that they cannot find the records and if we cash the cheque we are accepting final settlement.

Firstly if they cannot find their records, how is that my problem? I sent the original fully paid up policy recorded delivery (£4.75) which proves my Mum was covered.

Secondly, when did bartering become a part of life insurance payouts? It's not like when you write off a car and everyone tells you not to take the first offer.

Thirdly I can't believe that a huge company like that would take advantage of people in this way. There could be hundreds of elderly people a day receiving these £4.50 offers and just thinking that they should just accept it.

The company is Scottish Friendly. I am just disgusted.

I will let you all know how I get on, as I will be phoning them today.

Love

Mel x

Hi Mel,

How infuriating that these people have the nerve to send these letters out!!! put on that ninja suit hunny.X

They have'put a level > or

Thanks hunny I hope you kick ass@#~]}@# girl XXX

Hi Jac, good to see you (((((((((((((((((((((((((huge))))))))))))))))))))))))) how's things?
XXX

Thanks girls, as always. Had a really busy day at work which helped to take my mind off things.

Mel - words fail me. You're right too - it's their problem they lost the file. Have you thought about going to the Ombudsman - I think it's financial services Ombudsman? I've used them before and it brought about rather a swift result in my favour.

Em - sorry you're unwell. Look after yourself and listen to your body when it asks for a rest because I bet you have a terribly busy time!

OK - have risen today from the depths and am back on form for a while. I have a whole load of things I'm going to sort out. We're supposed to discuss finances as a family but it never seems to happen so I'll take it on board. Dad doesn't have a will much to my dismay. Mom won't be left particularly financially secure so I need to look at all the repercussions. It's likely to be complex and difficult so the sooner I start the better and I'm fed up of waiting for the others to talk to me about it so off I go!

Kelsey x