For those with a warped sense of humour WARNING- no punches pulled here

FormerMember
FormerMember
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Welcome to Warped.

I wanted to come back in time and explain something as it doesn't make sense otherwise...(though not much of this thread makes sense anyway)  I set up this thread as explained below with a lovely dear lady called Sunny Leith. We had a lot of chat on here and the silliness got me and her and lots of others through some hard times. Sunny left the site when there was some criticism of warped  and she deleted all her posts when she left. That is why it doesn't make sense to start with as all her posts are missing and it is a bit of a one sided conversation.... Enjoy it all the same...  

Hi there,

This is a follow on from the 'dumb things people say' recent thread that is moving here with a health warning!

If you are feeling sensitive please don't read this thread as you may feel offended.... and we need a place to say what we need to say without worrying about offending people so  you have been warned!!!!

This is for those of us who cope by being irreverent and silly and able to laugh at all the bad stuff. If you want to get the idea, read the last few pages of dumb things people say, I might see if I can cut and paste a few over to get us going....

In the meantime,

Sunny, you had me laughing my head off this morning with that image of you sitting there in your underwear, chocolate mouth etc!! I think it would have been hilarious if you had answered the door and invited them in.... they certainly would have needed oxygen by the time they got back down the speed they would have run away....!

Magel, how do they find us?? I live up a very steep hill in a very remote area and they made it up the hill to us too..... mind you, they were so out of breath they couldn't speak... almost felt sorry for them!

Can't remember what else we were on about as I can't see the last post anymore but lets continue here with the laughs and anyone new, feel free to join in.

Looking forward to hearing from you

Little My x

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    There were a couple of others Christine - one was really too dodgy, and I couldn't make out the lyrics in the other, though it had a fantastic video with lots of Haute Couture Merkins.  For anyone interested, just type'songs about pubic hair' into google. 

    Just don't blame me if you're shocked!

    Ann ;-)

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Sunny, I never even knew what a merkin was till I met you... corrupting Saint My you are!!

    Just thought the OK Bathroom tribute magazine idea through a little and realised it would actually be a bit X rated durrr.... so I think that one might not make the shelves....

    Deodorant's tribute book is open in the comments section of tonight's blog, though not sure anyone would want to own up to having met/known her... GC maybe?? but there is free sherry on offer from toothbrush if you are desperate....

    Little My x

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    I've left what I hope is an appropriate tribute...  Skipped the sherry!

    Ann x

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Hi everyone,

    I'm a new follower to this thread and have started to read it but haven't yet finished all your posts.  I just had to join.  I haven't yet read about you all and what cancer you have etc.  I joined this site as I thought I would get cheered up.  Until now I have been depressed with lots of the posts etc that  people put.  This illness (I'm being treated for breast cancer although they never found the primary source, it turned up in my lymph nodes under my right arm and all have been removed so on chemo at present, just had 3 FEC now going on to 3 lots of Tax, first one today then radiotheraphy for 5 weeks, anyway enough of that) is hard enough to go through and one needs cheering up.  Well I was laughing for the first time this morning reading your posts and wanted to add a couple of funny stories too, so here goes and hope it gives you all a laugh.

    One evening the ice cream van came round and I squealed with delight speaking like a child saying, ice cream, ice cream!! I knicked some money off my daughter inlaw who just conviently happend to be counting out her change on the coffee table, no time to lose, these vans don't hang about!  Well off I dash in the rain, in shorts, t shirt, slippers and looking like Homo Simpson!!  Didn't have time to grab a hat and cover up my scraggy bits of hair.  I've shaved it now so look more presentable hatless. Goodness knows what the ice cream man thought, I think I scared off his other customers as no one else appeared, oopps!!

    The second time was in Asdas, I was wearing my wig and the cashier asked if she knew me as I looked familiar?  Perhaps she thought I was Posh Becks, my wig was styled on her first bob, ha!  I replied I don't think so.  She said maybe it was your sister I saw in here recently?  I replied I don't think so, I have a sister but she lives in the states, oh she said it couldn't have been her but you do look familier.  At this point I had a strong urge to whip my wig off and laugh and say do I look familier now???? Perhaps I should have done, not sure she would have seen the funny side of it!

    Maybe I should go round hatless as people do feel sorry for you and seem to be more understanding and helpful..

    Anyway that was my two funny stories, hope you had a laugh and keep this forum going, I'm going back to read some more of your posts.  I particulary liked the joke about a woman showering and a man showering, I'm sending that on to my friends.

    All the best everyone,

    Nautical Annie

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Bloody hell, I leave for a few days and all hell breaks loose.

    How are you coping my dear!!  I hope my passing is honoured as greatly as your pubic hair. Would you do my service along with Sunny :) My family would love you two. My so called friends wouldnt know how to take it though ha ha.

    Loved the tribute song Sunny, so funny.

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Don't ever leave us again, Shaz...not even for a day.... Look what happens.!!! We can't manage without you...and we missed you too!!!! I am feeling a little brighter sniff, this morning, sniff, after such a lovely send off... happy to oblige for you, but its a bit of a lottery here of who'll outdo who... maybe we should just all say we'll do eachothers and then who ever is standing on the day...... knowing my luck, it'll just be fat awkward cow of a dog and Sunny's neurotic cat left for me ha ha

    Nautical annie.... if you are still here and breathing after reading all of it, you are truely warped..... welcome

    Little My x

    off to read the tribute book.... got my hankie ready...

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Ha ha, thanks for that, Chrisie,

    Actually, I'll have you know, I have an A level in art and can draw puke much better than that...

    x

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    woops, no lolly for me now then xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Aww Chrisie, you can still have a lolly...., though they are in the freezer in the blog house so you have to go over there to get it....

    Sunny has dared me to draw her, but don't want her to feel bad cos she starts her chemo today so might wait a bit.....

    You know how some things are delivered in discreetly wrapped parcels... well, no such fun here, just my bags which are so wrapped and delivered in a discreet van which makes me laugh cos I would love them to have a big sign on the side saying Colostomy Bags Co or somethting and a picture of a bag with a cartoon smiling face on it etc.... I would even draw it for them... so here they come this morning.. plain box, plain van  etc and lovely loud delivery driver who insists on coming up to the house and shouting even though I always say leave them in the garage.... so P is out and the door bangs... cats freak out and leap for the pheromones and I am being a lazy cow and don't want to think about today, (cos then it is tomorrow and that's scary, so bed seems a good place to be)so still in bed...so stumble out of bed to answer the door....

    Here's your bags he bellows, big grin.. ta mate I say and go in., thinking he did look at me a bit strange this morning... but a bit bleary eyed.....so maybe my imagination.... look in the mirror when I put them in the bathroom... Hair like a bog brush, sticking up like a complete loony..... bags under eyes...pyjama pants on back to front (!!) well it was dark and I was tired.. is all I am saying... and a big bulging bag sticking out... Hmmm looking good Little My! Think GC is going to  need more than a rolo......

    So, I guess he will leave them in the garage next time and it seems even hiding at home doesn't save me from embarrassment...

    I'll be in the broom cupboard if anyone needs me.....

    Litle Myx