Cancer Widow/Widower Club

Hi try this link to facebook http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/home.php?sk=group_132031893527449

If it doesn't get you there type inn widowed over 50 in the search box in facebook.  It' for both men and women

xx

orry for the double entry it's playing silly beggars

Wiljon I'm a bit of traditionlist and do my washing every Sunday, but I've noticed over the past 6 months I don't care for such trivial things anymore.  I used to be a mix between Mrs Bucket and her sister but since my husband died I've taken on his philosophy, who care's life's to short and houses are for living in, so I do what I can when I can or should I say when I remember.

I had a funny day yesterday, I felt like everyone was telling me off for some thing at work or that I didn't meet a target and I was speaking to my mother in law and just started crying, you know what it was lovely because she gave me such comfort, telling me that everything was going to be alright and that everyone is there for me, whether I want them or not.  My husband would always be the one giving me support and making sure I was alright and it was weird going through those emotions,   I tried to explain to my mother in law that I feel weird in my relationship with my husbands brothers not because they have changed but the situation has, you see my husband would go off with the men and talk about football and the like I would go with the women and talk about anything but football, now I find that I'm in this weird situation where my relationship with my brother in laws is one of me trying to play both roles and it feels weird, my mother in law was so sweet saying that it would all be ok.

Sorry about that needed to get that on to virtual paper.  So I'm feeling a little bit more up beat today and looking forward to seeing my new nephew and my neice next month.

But each day is getting easier, except today someone came over to me in work and said "sorry to hear about your husband", it seemed like it was a life time ago. 

There seems to be a lady who's trying to get all the over 50's to join facebook on this widows forum and I think that's a shame as this was meant for people to share there experiences, feelings, joy sadness, stories  regardless of their age.

Don't get me wrong there is nothing wrong with joining the group that she's suggesting but, it singles out people which is not what this is about.  We are all going through grief  in some form and it shouldn't matter if younger or older and this is why  this particular group was formed so that a joining of people can, join together in there feelings and bring comfort.

Hi,

Yes I agree. I have not posted much on this site, partly because I'm struggling to find my way round this site but also because I don't feel emotionally ready to share my feelings with everybody. I do read the comments and often get some comfort from them,

Also I was in a same sex relationship and have experienced loss of understanding because of my sexuality. I feel now that I am being excluded because of my age. We are all hurting. ~We have all lost somebody that we love very dearly and we need to be here to support each other. I agree, that there is nothing wrong with the facebook site - but please dont forget us younger ones.

jo

x

I agree.  Grief is no respector of age or personal circumstances.  We are all mourning our losses.

On the subject of washing days, I have found that I need to have some sort of schedule for doing what needs to be done around the house.  I try to set myself a target each day  either chores or shopping, even washing my hair.  I would never get out of bed otherwise

Wishing you all strength for the days ahead

Daffie  xxx

Thanks Jo, very much appreciated for your support :)

there are alot of widows under fifty too. this site is to help each other get throught life as best we can, there is no difference to what age we all all widowed at. why does the group need to be over 50yrs? to join?

Hi Guys

I think the facebook page is mainly for people to chat and make friends, according to the page people of 50 talk about different things that we youngun's don't  But if that makes people in that age bracket feel better then good luck to them, saying that I'd love to know what they talk about so I can be prepared when I'm in that bracket...lol

On a serious note I think it's a good idea that group have got together and started making friends, because I can see what they are talking about in respect of,once you reach a certain age it's hard to make friends and meet new people as you don't go out to pubs, clubbing or dinner parties on your own when your older.