Awake and up all night

Thank you Annette for your comments. I cant believe the wars you've been through over the many years. Keep on keeping on, a lot is definitely down to positive thinking. Cancer is such an evil illness. When you think how much it must have been there some 20-30 years ago for those who battled the journey to recovery. There have been such huge advances forward in recent years. Long may it continue. Bless you Nick 

Good morning Nick.  I'm so glad your cancer has been caught early and the top guns at Guys should stop it in its tracks.  It is indeed an insidious beast and fulfills the essence of the adjective; stealthily spreading gradually until it causes maximum impact.  Thank goodness for the continuing advances you mentioned.

Annette, it was me who proposed!  I'd been thinking about it when he was in the first hospital, but didn't want to give the poor lad a relapse, so waited till he'd been settled at home for a while.  There's 16 things, broken down into roughly four hour periods, I do every day for his care, hence my lists.  I have a good memory but freestyling wouldn't work and there's everything else on top.  So, we'll wait for a while longer and then make plans.  He has no choice - once my mind's made up there's no stopping me!  Tragic news about that poor lass - I'm gutted for her family and a cruel loss of a young life, just awful.

Steve, one of your missing posts did appear eventually, about your skills with the crutches and your mate in Thailand.  I was going to reply last night but didn't want to disturb you if you were resting.  I hope you're in a better place today and the chemo's not knocking you out.

Sweetheart, dreadfully sorry to hear about your poor husband's troubles.  Sarah, our community champion, has great insight into his type of cancer, and hopefully will respond to your post.  She's fantastic!

I'm with Nick on this one - a lot is down to positive thinking, if only to keep our sanity as without that, what a humourless and miserable bunch of buggers we'd be.

Keep smiling and hugs to all xxx

Oh Annette, what sad, sad news for your daughter’s friend. Desperately cruel for this to happen to that poor family. 

Sarah xx

Hello sweetheart I can see you are new to the community and posting, and you’re very welcome to join us all. Your poor husband is going through the mill, and I get that you have this need to be strong for him, but it’s really ok not to be strong all the time…it’s just too much to manage that, so please don't feel you can manage this on all on your own.

This is a lovely group to come on to when you can’t sleep and you’ll find lots of like minded souls who appreciate being able to chat when sleep eludes us-you’ll be among friends experiencing all sorts of different things with this disease as patients and carers, but I’d like to also give you some links to other groups in the community where you’ll meet people in the same situation as yourself, and your husband, and this can give you some extra support.

There’s no pressure to join any of the groups-if you want to just chat on here, that’s absolutely fine, but these groups might help if you need that extra little bit of support.

Bowel Cancer Forum

Family and Friends Forum

Supporting Someone with Incurable Cancer Forum

I hope you have managed to get some sleep so you are ready to face another day-everyone is here for you no matter what time of the day or night so you need never feel alone.

Please take care

Sarah xx

Hi Sweetheart, and a warm welcome to the forum from me, though I'm truly sorry you have to be here, and what you and your husband are going through. I can't add much to Sarah's post, but know from experience being the carer is in many ways tougher than being the patient, so it's so important you look after yourself, giving yourself a little time every day to unwind and recharge your batteries, will help you so much with the awful situation you are both going through, and if you need to scream, shout or rant, then do so, but please grab all the support you can, I too am stage 4, and have wonderful support from my family, but knew from my time in healthcare, the addition of outside support benefits everyone, and having my district nurses, hospice and their palliative care team on board has been wonderful, sweetheart, they are NOT just for end of life, I've had them for nearly 2 years, and the support they offer me and my family is priceless, the guys on here are pretty good too.

Eddie xx 

Morning Eddie

My apologies-I’ve realised I didn’t reply back to you yesterday. It’s a fast moving chat here and sometimes I miss things! 

That’s good advice for sweetheart and I’m sure it will be helpful for her. You have such a positive experience of hospice and it’s good for others to know what’s available there. My friend and neighbour 2 doors down volunteers at our local hospice and says it’s a wonderful place. All of you who volunteer do a terrific job, and I’m sure you get a lot out of it yourselves. 

Sarah xx

Hi Sarah, no apologies necessary my friend, I  too find it difficult to keep up with the forums at times, and I've been volunteering at the hospice for a lot longer, than I've been a patient,"mostly an outpatient," and would love to do more, but it's not possible any more, but it's so rewarding, and something I believe benefits everyone who does it. 

Eddie xx 

Hi Eddie

I fell asleep when I went to bed tonight and have not long woken up again so I’m in a bit of a muddle right now! I’ve taken my last lot of tablets for the day so I’ll likely zonk out again very shortly!

I think what you do with your volunteering along with everything else you achieve is incredible. You cope with so much and keep so busy but it sounds like you might be needing to slow down a bit? I often feel I don’t accomplish much in my day, so your level of activity rally puts me to shame. I’m hoping that I can start to function a bit better better with my new pain medication but it’s a struggle sometimes.

Things are quiet on here tonight-I hope some are already in the land of nod and getting some rest.

Sarah xx

Awww, bless you Sarah, but I'll say what I always say, I  get far more out of the community and volunteering, than I put in, I  have just had nearly 2 weeks away from the forums my friend, looking after one of my grandchildren, my little angel, she's just turned 1yo, and I'm sure your being too hard on yourself, your a community champion, and I know from #Millibob, all the time, effort, and dedication you guys put in to the roll, and I for one can't thank you guys enough, and I will have everything crossed your new pain management, gives the results you deserve, oh and thank you for mentioning taking your tablets, I'd completely forgot to take mine, so you see your helping others, without even knowing it, well time to take the dogs out before MEDS and bed, sleep well.

love Eddie and Sheila xx 

Morning all

I woke up at 3:30 and couldn't settle down again so I'm downstairs, I've had my first cuppa and I'm catching up with some soaps. 

We're taking the last of our visiting family to Canterbury today to get the National Express up north, then we'll have our house back to ourselves. 

I hope you're all getting some sleep. 

H