Hi everyone,
I’m really struggling right now and could use some advice or support from people who understand what this feels like.
My partner(26f) was diagnosed with ovarian cancer over a year ago. It was stage 3 and spread up to the fat above the bowel. She had the overy removed and three months of chemo, and after that, we were told she was cancer-free. She’s been doing well for the past year, and we really believed we were through the worst of it.
Recently, she had a polyp removed, and during a follow-up appointment, we were told that the cancer has returned — in the fat surrounding the bowel again and a cyst on the other overy. The doctors have recommended surgery to remove the affected area and possibly another round of chemo depending on how the surgery goes. They also mentioned starting hormone blockers to reduce the risk of recurrence.
The appointment where we found all this out was really hard. The oncologist was visibly worried and honest about the risks and mentioned worst-case scenarios, but also said there’s hope with this plan. I know they wouldn’t be recommending surgery and further treatment if they didn’t believe it could work — but I can’t shake this fear that I’m going to lose her.
Since that appointment, I’ve barely been able to sleep — I’m waking up after 1–2 hours with this overwhelming sense of dread. I feel constantly on edge, and it’s hard to focus on anything else. I know I need to be strong for her — I’m helping with her diet and encouraging her to stay active — but I’m so scared. I don’t know how to cope with this fear while trying to support her at the same time.
Has anyone else had a similar diagnosis and treatment plan? If so, how is it working for you or your loved one? It would really help to hear from others who’ve been through something similar.
Thank you for reading.
Hi Wendy H I see it’s your first post so a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but sorry to hear about your partners diagnosis and journey to date.
I obviously have no experience to help you out but to widen your support platform can I suggest that you join and put up the same post in our dedicated…..
……. support group.
This group is a safe place to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same support journey.
As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your partner and indeed yourself you may benefit from joining and posting in our……
Carers only (if you are their caregiver)
and
Supporting someone with incurable cancer (If this is applicable)
……. support groups where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
The Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
