Sex and cancer - Let's talk

Caverjet injections and tadalifl pills are working for me and worth trying.

Cheers

BM

Thank you!

My relationship with my partner of 35 years is now over - I overheard her talking with her 'bestie' saying that my 'equipment' is 'laughable' as it had shrunk with the hormone treatment and I couldn't get any sort of erection no matter what she tried (she didn't try much, and burst into laughter after about a minute).

I'm done!

I'm really sorry to hear that

That's very sad to hear,  I wonder if all options have been explored eg injections which I have found to be successful. Have you tried counselling together as I'm sure that there is a a way forward if the will is there. Best wishes BM 

That is so sad.  I had over half my penis removed due to cancer, and for several years I mis-interrupted everything said by everyone as a personal dig against me and my wife was walking on egg-shells. It took me several years to accept the changes to my body and at times the only way I (& my wife) could cope was through humour.   I'm not jumping to your wife's defence but maybe, and just maybe her laughter was just a coping mechanism to help her deal with the stress that she has been going through.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            I presuming  that pre-cancer, you had a happy marriage and a reasonable sex life.  You and your wife have probably had months of stress and this one set back does not need to be the end. If you still love her & she still loves you, draw a line under this, talk to each other, talk to a therapist and try to move on.  Intimacy will come naturally with time (and support), sex may be different but different can still be fun                                                                                                                                          The flip-side, is of course, if pre-cancer it was a love-less marriage, then take the opportunity to move on. Try to stay friends, especially if you have kids/grandkids.                                                                                                                                             I wish you every happiness going forward  

I’ve heard from people who said the key for them was just talking openly with their partner and figuring out new ways to feel close, even if it’s not the same as before.
Honestly, it helps to hear from others who’ve been through it. I’ve come across places like tosituhma.com/iskuri.php where people are real about their struggles and share what’s worked for them. Sometimes just knowing you’re not the only one going through it can be a huge relief.