Carpe Diem?

Hello ziela861

I think it is natural for cancer to change how we think about things and life in general. 

I have tried to become fitter by walking regularly and a lot of that is to be as fit as possible to help hopefully my cancer returning. And if it did return then I would be fitter to cope with any treatment. I also find mentally it does you good. I have also looked at my diet- partly due to side effects from radiotherapy but more to do with wanting to be more aware of what I am putting in my body and trying to eat more of a balanced diet. I eat a lot less processed food now. Being off work gives me more time to think about and prepare healthier foods. If I do want a treat such as some chocolate or a piece of homemade cake- I do- life is about balance!

Jane

Hi, of course healthy food is important, I just meant I am not crazy anymore with lossing 10kg etc. Some fat is not that important. Time for family is more important. 

Yes, I understand- family is far more important and I think the cancer experience makes us recognise that.

Hi ziela861

Honest Answer - Yes it's changed my whole outlook. I spend more time with my wife, kids, grandkids. I don't worry about the future, illness, money. I enjoy life to the full (after all I nearly lost it - click on the icon of the beach for the full story!) more holidays, no more grumpy grandad! Every day's a bonus - get out there and enjoy it.

The other thing it's made me think about is there are people out there who give their time when you need it. I had loads of help from the people on the Prostate Cancer forum during my "dark days" and I am there now putting back what I have had out - and more.

Cancer has also made me think you need a sense of humour to get through not just cancer but life.

Enjoy what you have - I am.

Best wishes to all.

Brian .

Hi Brian it is nice to meet you. I just read the whole story and must say you are a strong man. You went through a lot. Thank you for your message. Every day is a bonus - good sentence for a tattoo I guess take care Brian!

Hi - Thanks for your reply. The thing with Prostate Cancer and I assume other cancers is  - it's the waiting - appointment - waiting - results - waiting - treatment - waiting - and you build up a kind of special attitude as you are always waiting for something.

Once I completed my radiotherapy - and I saw some very poorly people there - I was determined to "get up and go".

Yes I have been through a lot - the only "pain" I had was the biopsy but I am determined no man should follow in my footsteps, so whilst I am now enjoying life to the full - I am also spreading the two words "Get Tested".

You take care and I hope you are well.

Best wishes 

Brian 

HI ziela861, I hope you don't mind me popping my head in! I just wanted to say that I thought this topic was such an interesting idea for a discussion thread. So much so, I've set it as a "Featured Post" on the Community Home page for the week. I hope you don't mind?

In answer to the actual question, I can tell you what my dear friend once said to me about how cancer changed them:

They told me they no longer felt any anger when someone was inconsiderate toward them. They no longer felt the need to prove a point even when they knew they were right. And they would never again pass up an opportunity to do something new. The long and short was, they just felt grateful to be here, and didn't let petty things bother them any longer. Very understandable.

It was a mistake for them to tell me about this, though. I now remind them of their quote whenever I am being deliberately annoying, and they just have to shake their head and laugh. 

Hi ziela861 I definitely changed a lot as a result of cancer, but not immediately. I was diagnosed with bowel cancer in 2018, and just got on with my treatment plan. Waiting for scans and blood tests after chemo radiation and surgery used to really stress me out. I did come to the conclusion that I was missing out on something. I separated from my husband after 2 years, joined a Pilates class and became a volunteer! The Pilates was to help with scar tissue and balance. I do eat a lot less processed food as I’m convinced it does play some part in cancer. I have had a secondary spread to the liver, a resection shortly afterwards, and am now having chemotherapy for another spread in the liver. My attitude is that I am kind whenever possible, but I won’t be treated badly. I have decided to try more new things and have just done a skydive! Next on the agenda is a wingwalk. 

Hi All, having cancer gave me a wake up call. I was feeling sorry for myself as going through a divorce after 23 years (thought I'd be married forever), my mum died, COVID, two teenagers suddenly finding things harder after COVID etc etc ..I was pretty sad and feeling sorry for myself. The cancer diagnosis was a shock, and since then I have grabbed life and started living again. I have had so much love, support and kindness and have talked to so many amazing people. I too just want to give back where I can , by listening, supporting and just helping where I can. I have started painting again and hope to use this to raise some money. I want to show my kids that times can be tough, but we do our best, pick ourselves up where we can, but support each other...I just feel more positive about life. Sending love and hugs to you all xxx

Well said Dungarees girl. My post was supposed to say I don’t eat a lot of processed foods! I was married for 30 years, the last few years not particularly happy. The skydive was to raise money for Macmillan. I volunteer for the British Red Cross in a shop. I come on the community forums to try to help with people in the early stages of their diagnosis. I don’t share my current situation as I don’t want others to think it happens to everyone.