I took my mother for a mammogram yesterday.
I was kind of certain about what we were going to hear, although mum really wasn't prepared.
Back story.
Mum started to struggle to eat. Swallowing became a chore.
Then she thought she'd hurt herself lifting something quite heavy. Pain in her back and across her front.
Feeling a lack of energy and not able to walk far.
Dr sent her for the camera down and it hit a blockage. They took biopsies.
Then sent her for a CT scan.
Then yesterday....
Me being me I researched breast cancer (mum had it 22 years ago dealt with radiotherapy and chemo).
So the Dr yesterday told us it's a big lump. 2.5cm.
I asked about the back pain and shortage of breath suspecting I knew the answer and it was confirmed, the CT scan picked up on the cancer in spine and pelvis and also lungs.
Chuff.
It's one thing expecting to hear something but quite something to actually hear it.
I held it together so I can support mum but I want to ask... Mum was asked if she wanted any painkillers. At the moment she's taking dissolving paracetamol. She asked my opinion. I said I take paracetamol for headaches and she's described being in a lot of pain so I can't imagine paracetamol really being enough. Anyway she has declined anything stronger for now.
Question 1. What medications do you recommend ?
Question 2. Clearly there has been a rapid decline in mums weight and mobility. She's lost over a stone and is only able to swallow liquids for now. (Talking about putting a stent in her throat to open the tube so she can swallow solids). The throat cancer isn't confirmed yet because the biopsies aren't back but that seems inevitable to me. So can we get some weight back on her ?
Question 3. The loss of energy and mobility seems to have been very quick. How do we go about getting a stair lift installed ? What are the time scales for installation ? Do we have the time ?
That's more than one question but all kinda linked aren't they ?
Thanks for reading and hopefully (unfortunately) someone may be able to recall their experiences and offer some guidance.
Hi RichardO17 and welcome to the Online Community but so sorry to hear about your mum's diagnosis. A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' cancer type and support challenges can help a lot.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) but as her official diagnosis is yet to be confirmed it's best not going down rabbit trails in our cancer specific groups, but once she has a clear diagnosis do look through THIS LIST where you will find all our many dedicated cancer support groups listed.
When it comes to the initial practical and emotional challenges of supporting your mum you may benefit from joining our Carers only support group where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges........ and it will be a good place to ask your questions.
To join the group first click on the “Bold Links” I have created above then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)
You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post. You can also scroll through other members posts and click “Reply” to get involved.
It’s a challenging time for you so you may want to use the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 or via Webchat and Email too. This service provide cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear. We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
If you need more help do come back to me in this thread. If you think you are ‘lost’ in the community just hit your community name and this will take you to ‘your’ area of the site where you will find the groups you have joined and also all the threads you have posted on.
