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Feeling really low and overwhelmed at the moment. And lonely. Had breast cancer diagnosis 2013 mastectomy treatment then tamoxifen. Reconstruction 2017. Rediagnosed Oct  2019.  Had radio.  Since then on zoladex letrozole and abemaciclib. They can’t remove tumour but drugs are controlling it. Have three teenaged kids (16, 15 and 12) they have all had various issues lately with lockdown/school etc. Lots of tears shouting swearing been going on. On top of that husband made redundant has now found work but he massively resents the cancer being once again in our (his) life. Massive rows and he always calls me names and makes me feel like shit. I am feeling like there is so much that needs too much of me. I am close to tears most of the time.  I can’t be bothered to clean the house or do anything. Then I feel guilty that I’m lazy. That I’m not properly there for the kids. That are rows are making them feel bad. 

  • Hi ViH

    I just could not read and run,

    this is such a terrible time anyway during Covid but to be in this situation again is awful. Please do not be so hard on yourself and allow yourself some time.. You are not alone in this situation and i hope you get some moral support here. I too have been home schoolong and have 3 children 3, 10 and 12. My 12 year old is in full swing of teenage hormones and my 3 year old is autistic. He has significant life long needs,  my husband is a personal trainer, his gym has been closed for months. Hoping to get back to work on the 12th April but the stress has been so overwhelming on top of my diagnosis.

    You are not alone and i have had all these feeling too, and im absolutely sure others here have had them . what's important is that you please continue to reach out.

    Do you have any one who can help you navigate these feelings or is it worth having a confidential conversation with someone here on the helplines.

    Sending all my love and huge hugs


  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to DannielleC

    Thanks so much for your kind words. It’s lovely of you to reach out and it’s a comfort to know I’m not alone. I must say the sunshine today has helped.  Some days are worse than others.  And am so looking forward to seeing friends and family again after the lockdowns. Your message really helped me feel better. Love to you and your family x

  • Hi ViH

    I'm so pleased, you feeling a little better, a bit of sunshine always works for me too, its a bit of a game changer tbh.

    I had a socially distanced coffee in the Park with a friend... such a treat. She is 3 years in remission and it was so nice to be able to of load to someone who knew exactly where i was coming from. i don't think you can underestimate the value of having someone in a similar position or who has experience to talk too.

    sending you positive vibes and strength and i hope you and your family/friends enjoy some time at easter.

    Keep posting

    D xx