Looking for support from people who have lost their partner

DoOneC 5 months ago

32 replies
32 subscribers
1597 views

Hi all,

2 months ago I lost my wife to this disease, she has rectal cancer.

She was diagnosed around June 2019 and battled with it until June 2025. It was a long, tiring battle and I'm so proud of everything she did.

She leaves behind me, her husband and our 6 year old daughter.

I have been struggling to come to terms with it as expected but I'm keeping going for her and our daughter. Lots will say I'm doing amazing as I continue to provide for her, she's fed, dressed, clean clothes still attending school and having fun trips out.

I seem to have the issues during the quiet times, when I'm sat at home with my own thoughts. Struggling to find the motivation to do anything more than the essentials. I'm sure many of us on here know exactly how I feel and I know grief is one hell of a beast that treats us all differently.

I was wondering if there was anyone on here that is going through similar, at similar ages (I'm 38 as example) that would like to reach out and talk? It's something my GP recommends, as it may help talking to people who are in the same boat as they say.

Id like to note I have reached out to the Hospice my wife was cared for as they offer bereavement support.

Thanks for reading :)

Insanity Kate 1 month ago in reply to PattyK

Hi there, the second year has certainly been interesting. For me, it has been more about the reality and impact of the loss. I have basically rethought my whole social life, and who I spend time with. Some friends have been amazing, others not. I spend a lot of time with my family, and a few close friends. I am not fussed about the rest. I still get the horrible intensity, although not as often. I seem at last, to be functioning better. I am also starting to experience happier memories, and can talk about them without sobbing. Sending hugs to all. Kate.xxx

PattyK 1 month ago in reply to Insanity Kate

Same here Kate. I think the 2nd year you have more time to sit and think. I don't have many close friends but I'm fine with that always been a bit of a loner anyway. I think the first year you are coming to terms with your other half not being there and you are occupied with sorting out all the admin and paperwork that needs sorting out after the loss. Days I sit and sometimes get quite down and angry at all the things that we did and wanted to do and now no longer can. I am functioning a bit better also I feel and can talk about him now and not feel upset. I have lots of happy memories too and some make me feel so sad but all part of the process I suppose. Take Care.

Vicky x

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