Loss of my partner

Sarah693,

Completely normal!

We all go through this rollercoaster of grief. It is like no other loss we ever experience. No day seems the same: some go well, others not so. We get up and try our best.

You will get much support on this forum.

Try to stay strong. Not easy but we all try.

WDJ

Thank you for your reply. 
It’s exhausting! 
This constant battle with my emotions and trying to keep doing the day to day things is hard.

I am trying so hard to be there for my kids but feel like such a failure because I know I am struggling

Hi sarah

1. I lost my husband 5 weeks ago and it is difficult to wake everyday knowing they are not there. It feels unreal. My dog motivates me and if it wasnt for him i would not go anywere. Please dont be too hard on youself you are in the early stages and theres a long road ahead of you. It is normal to feel what you are feeling hope you have some support around you and are able to take some time out for you too. It sounds as though your partner was young too. It also ok not to be ok. Xx

I’m sorry for your loss x

My partner was 34 and we had been together for 16 years. He was diagnosed with a brain tumour a year ago so it’s been a crazy rollercoaster for the last year.

im just a mess of emotions, it’s harder than I ever thought it would be.

Hello there 

Just wanted to say you are not losing your mind! So sorry for your recent loss. For your children too. It must be very sad.

Don't be hard on yourself. It is early days. Baby steps I call it. I am 4 months down the line, but there are slight moments of hope that I will get there. It is okay NOT to be okay too. Don't feel guilty.

We are all here. Just write! 

Hugs

Sarah you probably not had time to really think about the impact of all this on yourself. The stress the worry and now the grief. I hope you are getting help and support for you and your children. Xx

All normal has already been said, and very early days for you, i always just thought i would be siting crying, that never happed, it was the different emotions, i did not understand, did  not know that is part of grief,it was almost a year, before the crying kicked in, when everything had been sorted. that had to be done.

Does it get easier,it ill be three years for me next week, i do not know how i have got this far without him, never thought i would get threw the first couple of weeks, i did one day at a time, then a day turned into a week and so on..

I still have melt downs, and do not no where they come from, and emotions still kick in, though not like at the start of this journey, will this journey ever end i do not think so, grief is the price you  play for loving some one, hard price to pay.

You take care of your self and your children and use this group, i would not have got this far, if it was not here for me, in my time of need,and i still use it when i have to,

Dear Sarah

I can only say your not alone, I only joined this forum today and your my first post.

I have been looking after my wife for 5 years, three boys with special needs. My wife is now in St Wilfrids and I am waiting for mercy. Because when it comes, very soon now, it will now be a blessing. In reality I have been alone for the last two years because she has been so extremely unwell. I get angry when I keep hearing we are winning the battle against cancer, I dont see it.

I still have your journey and I am very frightened when it comes. I get you "living someone else's life" absolutely, I wake up everyday thinking the same must have done for 5 years now. 

All I can say is your further down the track than I am and your not alone. It really is a journey and everyone is different. When everything depends on you, your children for example, you can find an inner strength you never knew you had. 

Best wishes, better days will come.

Keith

New Leaf,

You will get much support on this forum from all who have been down this road.

Your comment about 'winning the battle' is so true; I don't see that either. In fact, I got really angry watching the TV earlier this week when one of the 'tv doctors' was harping on about if in doubt see your GP. Well it took about a year before the GP took my wife's concern seriously. It was a bit too late by then. The rhetoric about our healthcare service is just that.

Take care,

WDJ

Thank you WDJ

I sit here right now by my wifes bed getting deeper and deeper, have been on and off for years now. Super draining. Guess I should have joined a group years ago.