Lost my Wife and Best Friend

Hi Cralan

I am so sorry you have had to join this group, though every one is really friendly, and very supportive and truly understand the emotions you go threw,

I would never have got this far if it had not been from this group, it will be two years Friday since my hubby passed, i never ever thought i would get threw the first month.

 I have three grown up children, the same as you, who have all been there for me, but as you say, when they leave, it is so hard and lonely.

I really do not know how we are supposed to carry on, when your the only person with in the home.

I have to say i talk more to my hubby now than what i did at the start, tell him everything that has gone on that day and who i have spoke to, not sure if others do the same, but it really hel[s me get threw the day, i enclude him in every thing i do.

Even tell him when i am going to cut his grass.

This journey we are all on is not easy and none of us ever wanted to go on it.

I do not cry so much now like i did, i am not so sad and not so angry.

I still have melt downs and they take me of guard, i know he would want me to carry on the best i can and perhaps one day the sun will shine again.

We where together a very long time, i was lost but i am now starting to find out who i am with out him, though it has took a while.

Please use this group, as we have  been where you are and otherss are going threw.

Take Care Ellie xx

Hi Ellie,

thank you so much for your kind words, the things you say are exactly like I feel. I talk to my wife all the time and it makes me so sad but I know it’s early days for me. I have 2 dogs to help me through the bad times, one of which my wife arranged to get from a rescue centre in turkey just weeks before she fell ill he is not very well trained and now it’s up to me to sort him out for her. People have said I should get him adopted but there is no way I am doing that because it was my wife’s dream of getting him. I’m sure I’ll get him sorted and will update my progress in the coming months.

Thanks for your thoughts

Cranlan x

Hello Cranlan

So sorry that you’ve joined this group but I can only agree with Ellie. It has been a lifeline to me in the 50 weeks since I lost Chris. The people on here really do understand and share thoughts, advice and support at the most awful dark times. 
I talk to Chris every day, shed tears most days, often triggered now by the most unexpected things. But the tears are more often quiet rather than the sobbing of the early weeks and months. But oh how I miss him- we’d been together since July 1974, married for 44 years…..there’s such an enormous gap in my life. Our sons have been amazing but it’s hard for them too. I’m blessed with some wonderful supportive friends, but they freely admit that they can’t begin to imagine what I’m going through. 
My advice, for what it’s worth, is to visit this site when you feel the need. Read what others have shared- you don’t always need to respond, but I’ve found sometimes that when I’ve rambled on wondering if I’ve lost the plot, someone will reassure me that it’s all part of this grieving process. 
Take care, be as kind to yourself as you can be

Sending hugs 

Jane

x

Thanks Jane for your kind words I am also sorry for your loss and everyone else affected on this site

Cranlan xx