Physical symptoms of grief

It’s perfectly normal to have physical symptoms,I am 41 weeks down the line and had all those symptoms.I still get some and I also get random rashes on my arms and knees , they don’t last very long

Grief a physical as well as mental condition. I still can’t concentrate for long and my memory is terrible

Best wishes to you

 Maddy

Hi Maddy does it get any better?

i want really to just feel normal again even dare I say happy but it doesn’t seem to happen my brain doesn’t function either. I miss my husband all the time and just feel it’s so bloody unfair today has been a washout!

Hi there this weekend has been awful for me also miss my wife badly have been to her bird box at crematorium in tears driving home in tears had a dream about her woke up in tears everywhere I look I think of her all the couple's walking round the shops I think why not me so unfair I to would love to just feel normal just for a while please

Hi Hollybush

Does it get any better, the answer is yes and no.

its a different sort of grief, perhaps not as raw but it’s a deep deep sadness and emptiness.

I did a lot of my grieving before he died , I found out it was called anticipatory grief which arises when you of both of you know that there is not going to be a positive outcome to the illness

I used to wake up feeling as though someone was pounding on my chest,I was absolutely exhausted and aching all over. I had 2 minor scrapes in my car , after 40 years never having one,because I was driving with my head somewhere else.I had no energy .

Hopefully with time your physical symptoms will ease ,but I don’t think anyone on this group will ever be the same inside again, my grief is certainly for life, but I try to make the best of the situation , even if I don’t always do, some days everything is just too much

I miss him so very very much

Maddy

Thank you Maddy

I feel your sadness it is very profound and has definitely changed me. I also knew he was going to die before he did and he died after only 10 weeks of being ill having been fine before his Cancer returned and took him away he had to go through major stomach surgery time in intensive care and endless blood transfusions and chemo, before he finally came home .

I just feel ill all the time went to the doctor today as im also going through the menopause and think this is part of it. I have accepted that I cant do much at the moment I can manage walks with friends and general stuff but I cant work at the moment. I also try to not be too miserable about it and make the best of things as i feel otherwise Im doing him an injustice. Im 54 and feel im too young to be this miserable!Interestingly I have severe stomach pains which is where he had a burst tumor I sort of think im getting his symptoms. I find Yoga and walking great help. I sing in a choir but normally would do gigs but im not able to do that at the moment im too fatigued.

Hollybush

Hi everyone,

For weeks after Paul's death, I felt so exhausted and so tired, aching all over, no strength in my legs and arms, sometimes hot and cold as if I was getting the flew...

I think these symptoms come when our bodies realise what stress - physical and emotional and mental - they have been living with for years and it's the system saying, "That's enough. I can't take anymore."

And, even though those symptoms went mostly, I still have times when I don't feel well like at the moment. It started with a cough four weeks ago which wouldn't go away; now it's gone but now I have a mouth ulser; and I think that when that goes it will be something else again. 

I think it is just one of the ways our grief and our loneliness show themselves.

Love to all of you

Mel.

Hi everyone, I think physical symptoms of grief are quite common. It’s exhausting and when you’re tired everything seems even worse and you can be vulnerable to infections etc. I can’t recommend an afternoon nap strongly enough ( it passes some of the awful empty time too). Also for help with sleep at night I’ve downloaded an app called ‘Calm’ on my phone and every night, and when I wake up in the night, I listen to the ‘sleep stories’ and they really help me get back to sleep. Looking after ourselves with rest, sleep, fresh air, exercise etc is important. I’m currently trying to drink less too as i think I’d been overdoing it a bit. 
Sorry if you’ve already thought of all this - these are just some things that help me and I wanted to share x

Hi there 

can’t agree with you more about an afternoons siesta, I often have a little sleep , when the weather isn’t good, for an hour about 2 ish, i

I am lucky to be retired and able to do this, as you say not always from tiredness but to pass some time too.

i have the calm app, butI find with a drink (or two) at night, and a phenergan tablet I sleep well, sometimes lovely dreams when he comes

to me

I know people will say , don’t drink etc , but what the hell , life is for living ,if you call the star we are in as living

I loved your post occupation2heal, I am definitely on your wavelength 

kind regards 

Maddy

Thanks Maddy, I’m pleased you’re finding ways to get precious sleep. I’ve had about three lovely dreams about Mike since he died 7 weeks ago. I write them down so I don’t forget them x 

Hi All

I was so pleased to read all your comments on this subject I relate so much to them all. They have helped me so much it is so comforting  that you all understand so much & that we are all feeling the same. I do get to sleep but awake very early about 3 30 & that's it so I put the TV on it's comforting I don't feel so alone but I am constantly tired & don't have any energy which makes the days so difficult. I have to go shopping today but really do t want to all the Christmas stuff around but I know you are all feeling similar so I will try & think of you all with me but I will rush home asap as I feel safe at home although lonely , I have all my familiar things around me.

love to you all 

jojo x