I lost my mum 3 months ago. She had advanced gastric cancer. She was diagnosed in January 2025. She wasn’t able to have surgery. She had palliative radiotherapy 18 months ago. Which helped shrink the cancer. Then January 2026 she started having problems with swallowing. Mum had 3 cycles of chemotherapy which helped. She had a scan in May 2026 which showed the cancer had spread to the liver and lungs and lymph nodes in the stomach . So the chemotherapy was stopped. She had problems with swallowing so she had a stent done . It did help for short time. Mum was finding it harder going up the stairs at the end of the day. One night she was on the landing and her legs gave way and fell on her back. The next day she couldn’t out of bed. She went to the hospice and detoriated so quick. She was give days to weeks and died . We got her home as it was her wish to be at home and she died 5 days later. She had carers in during the day and my sister and I cared for mum overnight. I just finding hard to process everything. I was mum main carer . Helped with shopping etc. I saw mum most days. I was really close to my mum. Just feeling numb, shocked and feel isolated at times. I have good and bad days. Just taking it day by day.
Hi Mh612
It’s Megan here from Macmillan’s Online Community team. I’d like to firstly pass on my condolences following the passing of your mum. I’m sure when others feel ready, they will come by to show their support. In the meantime, I’d like to share the following information to help you access support when you feel you need it.
I am conscious this may still be a sensitive time for you, so alongside accessing peer to peer support from our Community groups, the Macmillan Support Line has specialist teams who are also there to support you. Sometimes it can help to talk things through with someone who’s there to listen. They’re available 7 days a week, 8am-8pm over the festive period. To get in touch, please call freephone 0808 808 00 00, email, or live webchat.
If you think accessing some specialist bereavement support would be helpful, there is lots of useful information in Macmillan’s ‘coping with bereavement’ booklet. It includes details of other specialist organisations trained to support people with their grief, such as Cruse Bereavement Care.
They have a free confidential helpline where you can pick up the phone and speak to their team of trained bereavement volunteers on their helpline by calling 0808 808 1677. You can click here for their opening times.
I hope the above information can be useful, and if you have any questions or need help using the site, please don’t hesitate to email Community@macmillan.org.uk or send a private message to the Moderator account.
Best wishes,
Megan
Macmillan's Online Community team
