I lost my mum the day after my first chemo 16/11/21, there’s never a good time to lose someone but I feel like this really is the worst possible time!
She was in a come for 30 days prior because she had an aneurism at work on the 16/10/21, I really thought she was going to pull through and I personally don’t think the dr’s gave her enough time but I’m not the expert. They didn’t give us an option about the DNR they put in place around day 14 and we also didn’t get any say when they decided on day 29 the wanted to take out her breathing tube (the day of my first chemo, which they knew) they did give us a day to tell family so they could be there but they weren’t willing to wait 1 more day than that, she did manage to breath on her own through the night but passed away the following afternoon.
we had a funeral a few weeks later on 30/11/21, my first chemo I was hit pretty bad with sickness so I didn’t manage to help with the planning all that much but my brother and dad did an amazing job, I did manage to organise the flowers and the wake so I’m glad I got to help out a bit. It was a really good send off and she’s of loved it and loved all the people that came
honestly am not sure how I’m going to do this without her. I knew all along besides my partner, my mum would be my biggest support but I know my friends and family will all come together for each other and me. But not going to lie I could really use my mum right now. She’s always been the first person in my corner and it’s going to be really tough without her.
I also think I should speak to someone as I’m not sure I’m processing it very well as everything’s so fast paced at the moment I just don’t have time to think about it or I don’t let myself and I know that’s probably not a very healthy way to deal with it. Although I don’t think there is just one way to deal with loss
I just want to video call her, we’d call most days sometimes multiple times a day so it still feels like of I called she’d answer but I know deep down she can’t. I feel like the aneurism was so sudden, and so soon after my diagnosis, I just never saw any of this coming. Especially at this age, I’m 26 and my mum was only 55, it all just seems so unfair but that’s life I guess.
stay strong guys 
