I'm continuing this blog - which no one other than I read - in the spirit of authenticity and the hope that anyone reading might gain some comfort in not being alone in their feelings.
Reality hit with a great big bang in the last few days. The adrenaline tide which brought me from France to UK and then on into the NHS has dissipated. To be honest I feel dreadful. Repeat migraines and a return of Covid era early morning anxiety and dread followed by waves of teariness and sadness. And yet, and yet, nothing has changed for the worse. It's all in me at some place or level that I can't control or analyse.
The facts are that we had an excellent week. Had an offer on a house accepted and started the mortgage application. J had an appt with the consultant and awaits an MRI and the sun has come out.
The main difficulty has been that J is determined not to think about the future- or not to speak about it , to be more accurate. I,meanwhile, can't help but be aware that any treatment (chemo most likely) is likely to be around the time we would be hoping to move house. That sounds like fun
Anyway, hoping for a better next week and news about scan dates and mortgages.
