“It’s the hottest day of the year,” dad used to say whenever he caught us with the gas fire on in summer. Whenever I say the words now, I hear him saying it.
I signed up for the Run For All Burnley 10K in November last year. I contemplated a ’30 in 30′ style list as I entered the final year of my 20s but when I could only list 5 or 6 things that I would realistically complete, I scrapped it. I settled on two challenges: run a 10K and use my 30th birthday to celebrate my dad. And what better place to run the 10K in memory of my dad than my hometown?
I started training in April. Usually inspired by the London Marathon, this year it piled the pressure on. With a friend training to run the 26 miles I found myself comparing my challenge to hers telling people “I’m just running a 10K”. But I was struggling to run even 3K. I’d definitely had the sweat, and on Easter Monday came the tears. The blood came a few weeks later with a netball tackle giving me the scabby knees of a 10 year old. I can’t do this. I’ve set myself up for failure. How am I ever going to do this?
“When I ran my first 10K it took me an hour and 15 minutes, and Kevin Webster from Coronation Street beat me!” my boyfriend reassured me, “I’ll train with you, you’ll do it”. And let’s be honest, a whole Easter Egg the day before a run is never going to make it in to a Women’s Running Magazine article on pre-race nutrition is it.
I’m reassured but still not confident so next I turn my running friend. We all have one; that friend who’s Facebook feed is full of inspirational running memes and screenshots of their last run. “I’ll do it with you,” she said.
I’d better get good at this running malarkey then. With a marathon running boyfriend training alongside me, and a fun run friend taking every stride with me on race day, I can’t be holding them back as I wheeze on the side of the road.
As the days got longer and the temperatures got higher, running got easier as I traded the treadmill for the pavements. I was actually getting pretty good at running, I managed my first 5K after catching sight of my tattoo He is the Guide and the Weight of Her World at 3.2K. With a month to go I was so confident that I told my grandad I could do it in an hour.
And then I got injured.
After three frustrating anxious weeks I finally had the okay to run again. Only one week to go. I managed a couple of practice runs but my cardio levels had taken a hit. I was nervous.
On Sunday 5th June 2016 I ran my first 10K, and it was the hottest day of the year. Not to mention the ups and downs that come with running in a Pennine town. At 3K I wanted to cry. At 6K I wanted to be sick. I hated every moment of the run. I wasn’t going to beat an hour, I wasn’t even sure if I would complete it. With my injury, of course it was a physical battle. But more than that, it was a mental battle. By now I’d surpassed my fundraising target of £500, I didn’t want to let everyone down. As the 60 minute pacer ran past me at what seemed like a 30 minute pace, I didn’t want to let my family down. I didn’t want to let myself down and I didn’t want to let my dad down.
I was disappointed at first. Running is hard. Running in memory is harder. But do you know what, I gave it everything I had. No matter how much I look back and think ‘I could have done this differently’ the truth is I couldn’t have physically given any more on the day.
I ran 10,000 metres. It’s not just a 10K. It’s an Olympic sport. And most important of all, I wanted to raise money in memory of my dad, for a cause that I don’t feel I can ever truly repay. And I did it. I ran it in an hour and 5 minutes and I raised over £800.
And perhaps in a few years time someone else will take that very same route to say thank you for the support their loved one is receiving today.
