Turns out I haven't updated this blog for about 4 months. Wow.
A lot has been happening... I had the pathology back which was pretty rubbish to be honest, 17 out of 19 lymph nodes positive (ouch) and an R1 resection. Doesn't bode well for a long term prognosis but I'm past worrying about that now. It's funny actually, how stressful I found the testing and biopsies and waiting waiting waiting for results pre-op, yet now I don't get concerned at all. I don't even look anything up on Google anymore. Well, much.
So yeah, op was on April 4th full stomach out. Since then I've been told I'm incurable, told I'd be having chemo straight away with herceptin, had a clear ct scan, been told they were holding off on chemo until they can see something on a scan which merits using it (and I guess so they can measure if it is working), had a surgical follow up which basically involved a doctor prodding my wound and stomach and having a token feel of my collarbone then telling me to call them if anything changed. The strangest part of all of this is letting go of the constant contact and appointments with GI nurses, oncologists, surgeons etc etc.
I went for a second opinion through to Edinburgh just to check they agreed with the treatment plan (plan being do feck all) and he seemed to think it was a reasonable course of action given my pathology. Fair enough mate. He also spent some time explaining that although chemo-op-chemo was the gold standard, so many people fail to complete the post op chemo that the evidence for this being necessary is a little sketchy. Maybe he was just saying what I wanted to hear, but well, it was what I wanted to hear so that was nice.
Outside "my cancer life" things are going well. My horizon is still about 3 weeks in the future though, and given my eldest has just started school and is obsessed with things he'll want to do with my when he's 8,9,10 etc, that can be a little tough. Anyway, yeah, he's just started school, my youngest is just getting used to being in a proper bed and life rolls on (faster than I used to think it did for sure). Off to fuerteventura on Saturday for a week of sunshine, making plans for Christmas etc and even arranging to go back to work at the start of December assuming the Thing hasn't made a return.
Do feel a little in limbo at the moment, but it's better than the alternative, and health wise I feel bloody great, so I'm just going to go with that for now and see where it takes me
