havent been on here for a while had a lot of family problems but had to come on and have a little moan got my batch of 6 monthly tests tomorrow think id be used to be it by now after 3 years but it gets harder each time cant help thinking the longer they say im clear theres more chance of it coming back then i panic thinking what happens at the end of the five years when i am all clear and there is no more checkups !! i hate having them but at least ill know if its back just cant stop the thoughts at the back of my mind always there no matter how hard you try and bury them and be positive :((
keep telling myself to get a grip theres a lot of people out there a lot worse off than me just need to be able to get things off my chest and this is the only place i can do it
i get my results next week on our 24 th anniversary of all days just praying its good news and weve got two things to celebrate :)
