HMMM today I thought I would start my blog, come to think of it I think it might help. Ok so the last 24 hours have been another rollarcoaster ride yet again.
For those wo dont know me or havent read any of my posts (thats one). I am raayne and i have been coping with cancer in the family. My aunt who has been given weeks to live is dying of cancer it began its nasty manifestation in the lung. it has spread and now my aunt is in the last stages of her epic cancer battle.
I found this site when I was at a low ebb and decided it might offer me support, I have considered making a post all day but now I feel like I can commit some words to my bog. I have read some previous blogs on here some are hopeful others make me feel that familiar feeling I feel once to oftten, others make me feel ever hopeful, but of all mine is the most important right now this is my first time of telling the world how I feel , its ok to feel lost and rock bottom. Its ok to cry myself to sleep most nights and its ok to talk to others about my suituation. something i wouldnt have said 3 weeks prior to joining this site. i guess even those who seem to have themost strength eventually end up being carried ( this is where I talk about my partner , my life , my strength and my courage.) I have not been the easiest to live with ask him? . i know I will call upon him increasingly more, and probably this site . well here's my first blog and sitting here i feel relieved to have broken my silence .
God Bless all those who are affected by this and the effects of cancer ......
xoxo Raayne xoxo
FormerMember
Hi Raayne, glad you got that off your chest. You are so lucky to have such a supportive partner. None of us are the easiest to live with during hard times, but having someone to lean on is a great relief. I hope your aunt is peaceful and not in any pain. Remember we are here for you. Best wishes, Christine xx
hi christine. I hope you are having a good and restfull evening. thankyou for your reply to my blog I have been a bit nervous thinking I may have come off wrong in the eyes of other people. My aunt is doing well, after spending all the evening at the hospital with her she seems quite cheerful tonight. she has kept on smiling and we have even discussed going to a respite home. she is looking forward to leaving the hustle and the bustle of the hospital behind her . And no offence to workers for patient line but it sucks you have to pay for tv. Auntie wants me to take a tv schedule thingy up with me tommorow. well bed time for me soon have to be up early to get things sorted before I see her xx
Hi Raayne, good to hear from you. Please don't think you have come off wrong in other peoples' eyes, this site is great for offloading. We all understand completely how you feel. I hope today found your auntie keeping well. As for paying for tv, it is disgraceful. As if hospital patients don't have enough to deal with, they are asked to pay extortionate rates to watch tv. Thankfully, I'm not particularly a tv fan myself. Keep me informed of how your auntie is doing will you? Regards, Christine xx
HI Christine .... sorry bout my late reply things have been hetic my end . They moved aunt from the norfolk and norwich to the palitive care lodge where she has nurses on call 24/7 things have gotten alot worse. The docs have told us to start preparing as she has progressively gotten weaker still i visit her everyday and manage to make her smile ..
Oh Raayne, I'm so sorry to hear the news about your auntie. Good that's she's got care 24 hours a day, of course, but this is a very difficult time for all involved. Hope to hear from you soon, but I understand you are occupied at the moment. Just remember I am here for you if you need to talk and you can send me a PM if you like. Thinking of you, Christine xx
