Why is life so awfull??? My poor Paul is really poorly at the moment. He was diagnosed last September with lung cancer that had spread to his spine. Its gone mad lately even gone into his jaw so has trouble eating as he can't open his mouth very far. That is all he needs as he is very thin now . When I look at him I can't believe that is my husband sitting wasteing away in the chair !! He can't do very much now , he is constantly tired and in a lot of pain. Our hospice nurse is great but there is only a certain amount they can do .We are waiting for him to start a new drug called tarceva and are keeping our fingers crossed that this will give him a better quality of life !!! Has anyone had tarceva ?
I lost my darling Dad to this terrible desease in February and can't bear the thought of loosing my darling just yet.
How do you cope as they get worse ??? Its so hard watching them struggle every day . I keep very possitive in front of him but inside I die a bit too.
I'm seeing a counsellor which does help a bit but of course there will be no happy ending for us . I can't bear to look at a old couple walking along the street cos that will never be us . We are only in our 50's
God its like someone has burst my balloon sorry to rave on but I feel full up today !!!
FormerMember
There are times when it is overwhelming and its much better to let it out here than bottle it up. No one judges and you will find lots of friends ready to support and try to help lift you back up.
It can never be easy to watch a loved one in pain and to see them fading before your eyes. I know how you feel because I've been through it with my husband, who died - God, I can't remember! About 20 years ago. You just get through it the best you can. But not every minute is awful - there are happy moments and you have to treasure these and store them up in your memory bank.
The main practical thing is to get as much help as you can as it won't do anybody any good if you wear yourself out and become ill yourself.
So sorry to hear what you are going through . My husband also has terminal lung cancer. The last 12 months have been the worse ever. He had chemo from oct till dec .The cancer was steady for a while .When it started bein active again he was offered tarceva ,
One tablet is taken every day, after the first week he was covered in spots an skin so dry , He was so tired all the time . You get a package with samples of creams in the aveeno suited Dave the best. He took it for 10 weeks and decided he had had enough. Tarceva gave him some extra time with us .
At the moment we are going to the hospice every week to try and sort his pain and breathing out. Like you we are in our 50s looking forward to having holidays on our own again . Life is so unfair hope the tarceva gives your husband some relief an i havnt been to negative , Please let me no how things go, Take care Lin x
Thankyou for your replies . It did help to let rip on here i must admit and its been comforting in a weird way to know I'm not alone !!!
I do store things in my memory bank as its true what you say we need to draw strength on that later on
Thanks for the news on the Tarceva. I hope it does help Paul . Fingers crossed he won't have too many side affects.
He is going in Hospital once a month for a pain infusion called Zometa it takes about 15 mins and is helping with the pain . Has your hubby been offered this ?
Dave has never been offered Zometa .He is on a cocktail of drugs , Having never taken pain killers in his life.
I have also been to see a councellor which i didnt feel comfortable with .dont no what it was , I sometimes meet our mac nurse for coffee which i find helps . The future petrifies me . the thoughts of being on my own. We have 2 sons of 22 and 1/8 they have there good and bad days they just hate seeing there dad so ill.Do you have any family .
