I'm off for a bit, Take Care. x

Vicki......this site is for real people with real problems and the idea is to share our experiences with each other be it good or bad love. It cannot always be good positive vibes spread across the site. If you feel you need a break, fair enough but if you need to get your emotions out with us, then do so. I know how you feel my sweet I was in your shoes so many years ago and back then there wasn't the support. I am known on here for doing my humourous blogs but when I am low I also put those down too, if I tried to keep it all inside I would explode. I wish you well love. Take care...love Carol x

vicki, first off all i send you the hugest of hugs xxxxxx

dont dissapear unless you feel its best for you !! we are here for you, for the bad times as well as the fun , you are grieving, and you need to let yourself do that , in time you will find the hard times are with you less and less ,and the good memories start coming through again ,trust me i know , i can now 5 months in look at ju,s pic and smile and remember just how much we loved each other, which i think for me is a huge step,

and that will happen to you in time, but its still very early and very raw ,

and as for your friend , i can imagine she is so relieved that you felt you could open up and talk to her ,as if she is a good friend she knows you really needed it, i know talking about it is hard , but honestly its the best way forward , and you are not selfish ,

you are a lovely kind person and i for one think the world of you , and will always be here for you for anything ,

let us help and support you , and listen to you ,as you do to me and others ,

lots of love jenni xxxx

Hi Vicki,

I lost my Mum to cancer 18months ago and also have 3 young children, so completely understand what you are going through. I have never blogged on this site as I've always felt too sad and like you, didn't want to be the voice of doom and gloom, but I do come back occasionally as there are a few amazing bloggers on here and I like to catch up and see how they are doing.

I guess I wanted to say that talking over and over and over about your Dad is the best thing you can do right now, and any friend will understand that. Your black cloud will pass and then come back again, as life will never quite be the same again, but the best we can do is accept the sadness and live our lives as our parents would have wanted us to.

I think reliving what happened to your Dad is normal - however painful, it was the last time you had with him and we want to cling to those memories. I let myself have a year off - no expectations, I could be as sad, tearful, grumpy, angry as I wanted to be without fear of me trying to 'give myself a shake and snap out of it'. Let yourself grieve and then later on when the pain isn't so bad, you will start living again and your Dad will be smiling down and bursting with pride.

Are your children helping? I found I had no option other than to get on with life which helped otherwise I think I would ehave crawled into a whole and not come out. However I also craved time to myself to bawl my eyes out and scream at the top of my lungs about how unfair it all was. I hope you are ok, it is so hard.

Sorry for going on...this is why I don't usually reply!!!

Love Maz xxx

Hi Vicki,

You do what you feel is best for yourself, and when your ready we hope to see you back on site but only when you feel your ready. I couldnt put it better

than Carol.

I just hope that you start to turn the corner and are on the road back to health, and get rid of the deamons in your head.

Take care and be safe Big Hugs Love Sarsfield.xxx

Hi Vicki - I cannot add much to what has been said alread with out just sounding like repeat, but still feel I have to say something

You must do what you think is best for you - but do you really think that not staying in touch with your friends on here and asking for support when you need it most is the best solution?

So many people on here know and understand what you are going through from there own experience - you will come out of the tunnel one day - let them show the route please.

You have not been on here very long - but already you are a well loved, respected  and cared for part of our Family - you strength and spirit has already been shown in the way you have supported others - despite your own grief. - You have even managed to take the micky out of me a few times with some of your blogs !!!

As I say you must do what you feel is right - but don't rush the decision - you would be really missed if you did leave mate  

Take care - love and hugs

John xx