Well here we go, Blog number 2. I have felt better today, but can't shake off this depression. Goodness only knows what I'm going to be like when I do find out exactly whats going on. I have my first appointment with the consultant coming up on Monday. I know my husband is hoping that we will be told to just go on our holiday (which is in 2 weeks time) and that we'll sort out anything we need to do when we get back. Trouble is I don't think I could live with this - another 2 weeks waiting?? As far as I'm concerned I want them to get on in there and cut everything out. In any event I'm sure they'll want to do a laparoscopy to at least have a good old look. I don't know what the recovery time is on this? I think I might take a while longer for me than some people, as being overweight I expect it will be a bit more difficult to do than normal. Maybe I'm reading too much into it, who knows?
I normally do all my cleaning and washing on a Saturday but I haven't done anything today. I haven't even made dinner - told my 2 boys to make their own if they want anything. I can't get interested in food, and believe you me I'm still shocked at that. I had been dieting the last 3 months anyway, but all this worry is making me lose weight faster. In the past I would have reached for food as soon as I was depressed and it used to make me feel so much better. Chocolate was like a drug to me, and it's rather shocking that I no longer crave it.
It's my youngest Birthday on Thursday - he'll be 17. I hope I'm not in hospital then, but I've told my husband to make sure they go out even if I am, as it's not fair on my boy otherwise. My eldest has Aspergers Syndrome, which means he does not feel emotion in the same way as most of us. To be quite honest that's been a blessing when I've been in severe pain and needed him to call an ambulance, as he was very matter of fact and extremely calm. The times it's not a blessing is when he can't control his temper!
Oh well, I've rabbited on for long enough now. I'm going to read some other blogs now.
Angie
x
FormerMember
Hi Angie
Hope you are a bit cheerier today. I was same at the biggining, i lost appetite but managed to force soup down as we know we got to keep strong. I was totally addicted to chocolate aswell and went totally off it, even after my appetite came back. I still dont crave it now im clear whih is really weird lol. It was shock at the beginning i think plus i couldnt sleep and god do i need my sleep. I thought i was going off my head lol. After you know whats what you'll be fine, as you say it the hanging in limbo
