After January spent in treatment with every week getting slightly worse. Some issues were drug related - couple of the anti sickness made me extremely agitated so I couldn't sit down. It was terrible but luckily a friend suggests I ring triage line and they took me off the drug straight away which made me feel heaps better.
Last week of radiotherapy was hard with things getting very painful and sore. Because it's an active area, going to the toilet was very painful. It was a bit of a nightmare getting the right pain relief until in the end I got slow release morphine with oromorph liquid for top ups when pain was bad. This has made it much better and now I'm sleeping again since I don't get woken up feeling like I've been stabbed on the behind.
The worrying growth kept on growing and then suddenly a week after treatment it just shriveled up. Whilst this sounds like good news I'm now petrified that another growth will come back that quickly. If it does then my options are not good and I would looking at full surgery with stoma bag.
Loads of lovely messages. It's hard when they say - your strong you'll be fine but the reality is I don't feel that strength has anything to do with whether it returns and I don't know if I will be fine. Definately taken a toll mentally.
