I've refused chemo...

2 minute read time.

FormerMember

14 Oct 2009

Hi everyone !, Not used to this site yet and never know where to write to....so here goes it gets to someone who can understand ...hopefully.

Diagnosed ayear ago with tumour in my colon. Had right hemi colectomy almost 12 mths ago, followed by discussions re suggested 6mth chemo course which I felt was not worth all the hassle, especially as 17 of 29 lymph nodes were positive. I still feel the same way 12 mths later and have had an enjoyable summer; which I wouldn't have had if I'd agreed to chemo. My family have not really understood my decision, but seem to have accepted it. I know that its highly likely to spread to my liver/lungs and possibly bones by now, or within the next few months. My 1st annual chest/abdomen/pelvis CT scan is in 2 weeks time, with the a colonoscopy similar time. I'm still very happy that I did not agree to have chemo ,and feel able to live life as I choose, each day and make some plans for a few weeks ahead at a time.

This is the quality of life I've chosen to have NOW, and will hopefully cope well enough with whatever this cursed disease chooses to throw at me in x months time.

I am not afraid of dying...well not yet any way !! Maybe when its staring me in the face I shall feel different; who knows. Meanwhile my granddaughters still have a lively, active and funny [so they keep telling me !] grandma who can still take them to ballet class, read to them, listen to their little secrets etc. What I did not want them to do was remember a very sickly, tired grandma who was always in/out of hospital etc. I'm hoping [ like us all]that my end of life will be fairly quick and least disturbing to my family. NO..... I am not being a martyr, I just feel its my right to choose, yet even various professionals whom I come into contact with keep saying its very unusual for someone to refuse chemo....and look at me as if I'm hiding something.....totally ga ga .... or a fraud !!!!!

Is there anyone out there who CAN understand my decision , or maybe even someone who has also refused chemo. It just might help me feel less isolated from all your unquestionably brave people who have grasped the nettle; called chemo ?

Love and hugs for anyone who needs one right now.

xxxx

FormerMember over 15 years ago

Hi,

i am currently having chemo for breast cancer, my mumwas diagnosed with non-hodgkinsons lymphoma 3 years ago. She started chemo but then refused it as she felt that the benefits were not enough for her. She had been told that it wasnt going to cure her. The doctors could not understand her refusing chemo and said that at the most she would only live for about a year. 3 years on she is still here, bossing us all about and being a great grandma. The disease has progressed, and she should take things slower but she is determined not to let it rule her life. I dont want to lose my mum, but i am so proud of her and the way she has delt with it all. To this day she doesnt regret her decision, although i will say that my brother is not happy that she refused chemo, but i think thats because he doesnt want to lose her either.

take care and big hug to you

anna
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FormerMember over 15 years ago

Hi Pammy62

My husband had huge (13 hour) surgery and then chemo. It nearly took him longer to get over the chemo than the surgery. A year later it appeared that the chemo hadn't totally succeded in doing the necessary and although he was offered a different type, he said no thank you, not a chance. He actually wished he had not had the first lot, but hindsight is a wonderful thing. He did not regret that decision once even though sadly he did not have too much more time.

I think that you just know what is right for you. I am a great believer in whatever the decision that you make, it is the right one, because you chose it, so that makes it the right one.

Hugs and thoughts.

Judi
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FormerMember over 15 years ago

Hi Pammy62,

Its your decision, if you feel that chemo

is not for you, but quality of life is then i

agree with you 100per cent. I had been

a nurse for many years caring for people with cancer and my opinion is

sometimes for certain cancers and how

far the cancer has progressed chemo is

not the best way. And many people have

told me that thy had wished thy had not

had chemo , there quality of life was zilch

But we all hang on to hope dont we, and

like you say we all have a choice, and i

hope you have many many years ahead

of you to keep your grandchildren

laughing.

With Love Lucylee. xxx

have told me that there
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locovan over 15 years ago

It is your decision to make --we all have to make a decision that we feel comfortable with.

I have been given no hope of a cure with the mesothelioma but I have decided to take chemo as I feel there might be cure round the corner.

I have a positive attitude to my nasty inside of me.

We are all different and cannot say what is right or wrong for others--it is what you and you alone wish.

Goodluck to you and I put my arms around you.

Love Mavis
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FormerMember over 15 years ago

Hi,

You have the right to choose which route you want to take on this cancer journey .... Each one of us will take a slightly different route as we are all different, but all those routes are the right ones for us.

I had chemo, luckily with no side effects but the little blighter has returned . I too have grandchildren and decided this year to give them granny experience days for their birthdays..... each had a day out with me to a place of their choice, one choose the zoo, the other a trip to the Deep.... laying down memories for them....

Goodluck I hope the time you have left is long and full of joy and laughter

Love Kath x
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