They say you ought to be careful in the winter because the cold can cause havoc to the population's elderly. They never remember to tell people that it's just as likely in the blistering heat of the summer months. This latest heat wave has seen two relatives die and another two admitted to hospital, where they still remain. It's a worrying time for our family and where as I'd usually be down like a shot to assist in any way I can, currently daily trips to the hospital make that impossible when the majority of them live 350 miles away. The joys of settling so far away I guess.
My mother is stretched beyond her comfort, feeling as though she needs to support both her parents and the wider family, especially where my late Uncle Richard is concerned. He was a reclusive soul, prefering to communicate by phone rather than in person and by all accounts it was discovered he hadn't ever vacuumed his house, which is a bit grim given he'd lived there about 27 years. Not sure how he could have vacuumed of course, since they also found he had no vacuum cleaner!
Plenty of others have offered to help out, to look for the will under the mountains of paper work and to eventually pack up the assortment of good he accumulated during his lifetime. I'm sad he died alone but then he chose to live alone and I guess that is a side effect of deciding you prefer your own company. It's not like he wasn't supported at least.
My parents are both still in their early 50s so hopefully it won't be something I need to do for rather a long time yet. When Hairy's mum died it was the first time I'd ever really had to learn the ins and outs of funerals and all that went with it. The absurdity of having to pick her an outfit to wear, as if she was going to a party; her last big hurrah perhaps? We didn't know whether she'd need shoes (no as it turns out) and should she be buried in her wig (yes, her best one). What sort of coffin would she like, as if we were picking her a new car for her birthday. What about the handles? I've never met a person yet who has an opinion on coffin handles; who are the people making these decisions in life? I thought it was bad enough when I bought my house and suddenly developed opinions about taps! Hairy's mum was only in her early 60s, far too young to have been ravaged by cancer the way she was, or so I thought. She'd had a while to plan out what she wanted from the day. She asked to be buried and decided on the church for the service. She was an amazing woman and the church was absolutely packed on the day. It was a beautiful service and I was so proud of Hairy for carrying his mum with his uncles from the car, into the church. I remember I wanted to hold him tight until the despair washed away but I have a feeling I'd have cut off his circulation if I'd tried to put this desire into practice. It'll have been 2 years in November and whilst the pain isn't raw anymore, it's still there; she left a massive hole in their beautiful family. It does make me worry about what will happen to Hairy and I if we never have children and one of us dies. We've never particularly wanted children; I like to borrow rather than keep but I'd hate for him to be alone. I really don't want him to die alone like Uncle Richard.
Things in ginger cancer watch are still ticking along nicely though. The little tumours appear to have run away screaming and the large scar no longer has such defined edges. There's still something dodgey going on in my throat but I'm not convinced it's related to the 'C' word. With any luck, I'll get to the end of radiotherapy this week and that'll be all I need for quite some time. My haematologist said he saw one woman who didn't relapse for 15 years; I'd definitely take that! No relapses ever would be amazing, but if I make it to 42 before I need treatment again I'd be rather impressed with my ginger self and it's weird cells.
Hairy is still a little sad about the loss of the 2nd great love of his life (his car). At least I hope the car comes 2nd after me! I'm hoping once he feels less stressed he'll get back to his happy go lucky self. I understand it's bound to take time. He's being a super star making sure I'm getting to all my appointments, have everything I need and am getting plenty of sleep. I think he'll likely need longer than I will to get over the last few months since he's been the one supporting my stress as well as carrying his own and it's not something he was born for. Bless his little face.
On the plus side, the cats are still adorable beyond belief and I love having some wonderful snuggles from my new furry companions. They're little soppy terrors - I love them entirely already!
Have some furry cuteness!
Gabriel, the Gorgeous!
And of course Loki - the Lovely!
