This is the third time of trying to post this, if it doesn't work this time..I'm going to bed!
Shit day, took mother to visit uncle in the nursing home, he's very poorly, in fact he's dying.
So mother did the whole drama queen, wailing etc!
Spent three hours stroking his hand and whispering in his ear our secret code for I Love You.
Mother demands a sandwich from the carer cos she's hungry ( she's got more front than Brighton pier) then goes back to wailing.
Worried about my dogs being left alone for so long without a pee and no neighbours to help out.
Talked to the nurse about funeral directors etc!
Uncles breathing intermittent, chest rattly, clammy etc.
Returned mother back home and made her some lunch.still hungry! Can't find it in me to do the whole daughter thing of sitting comforting her like I know I should.
Drove an hour home to find shed rang me three times asking if uncle would be pining for her..I don't think so because he's unconscious!!! She still thinks its all about her.
Not looking forward to tomorow, got to do it all again.
Nursing home rang just now to say no change..
Sorry for the whinge, I know there are so many out there with far worse problems than me, I just really needed to offload..Sorry.
Love to all.xxx
FormerMember
Poor Uncle. I think it will be a merciful release for him but, on the other hand, you can't quantify the value of life - I've said before (probably) that it's possible that the less you have left, the more you hang on to it. Trust your sainted mother to make it all about her though!
Don't apologise, Mandy. Ever. you have got a massive amount on your plate and I really feel for you. I wouldn't swap places I can tell you!
How you put up with it and have the energy to stay ok with her and not snap at her I don't know.
So sorry to hear about your uncle, though I guess when you are 90 death is inevitable one day.
I am glad you get to spend some time with him whispering your codes and stroking his hand and i wish him a peaceful passing.
I wish you some peace and quiet too and make sure you make time for yourself too cos you are important and they'd be stumped with out you so don't feel bad if you take a break.
I think it might be wine o clock.
Chin chin my dear and hope tomorrow isn't too bad.
Whinge away lovely multitasking lady
Little My xxx
ps can you book a day of multitasking lounging around, drinking, shopping and pampering? I think you need one xxx
Oh Mandy you are very naughty saying sorry to us 'cos there really is no need!!!! Your situation needs just as much offloading and supporting than anyone elso on here.
I'm really so sorry to here that your Great Uncle is near the end. He sounds like a wonderful man whom you are obviously very proud of Remember the love that you both share and all the lovely memories can never be taken away. Your emotions will be all over the place and it's all so surreal right now but you'll get through and stay strong 'cos you need to. You have done a bloody brilliant job to now and your big girl pants will keep on going.
I wish you much strength and send my love and hugs to you, your Uncle and even one for mum xxxxx
Take care
Jan xxxxxxxxxxxxx
ps I re wrote this 3 times 'cos it's hard to make the words express properly. (((hug))))
You've heard it before Mandy, there is no need to apologise on this site. You are working your socks off trying to cope with Uncle and Mum.
Do take care of yourself and don't be afraid to take a break and pamper yourself, you deserve it and then you will be refreshed and have more energy to visit uncle and cope with a demanding Mum.
I hope uncle doesn't suffer too much and that his eventual passing is peaceful.
