Oh dear oh dear,
Today's not been the best, great uncle is so very confused, he's been up all night not able to sleep but not knowing its nighttime anyway, he got up in the night and tried to make himself a cuppa, only he actually made it in the kettle... Tea leaves and milk!!!! Thank god mother switches off all the plug sockets in the kitchen, he had put every ring on on the cooker...which was switched of at the socket but he'd managed to get the kettle to work by switching the socket back on!! ...needing a cuppa in the night knows no bounds!!
But all day.. And I mean all day long he hasn't been quiet..he's talked or should I say gabbled all day long!! We have had ants on the floor where he's thrown cups of tea over them ( I'm sick of mopping the floor) we've had how nice it was to see the queen mother , wev had the low down on how to row a boat...but the worst was when the carer came back at lunch time ( a large girl!!) he said 'oh it's lovely to see you again....your look like a big lump of lard...I bet when you get in your car the suspensions under a bit of a strain!!... Omg...how do you get round that one?? I said something quite ridiculous about Going to Zumba classes ( the worst thing to say, considering how big the carer is), but she was very very understanding poor girl..I just don't know how to shut him up???? He's been like this since 2am this morning..he won't doze like he normally does during the day, he gets quite cross if you suggest he has a doze...it's as though he's been on some drugs..!
Poor mother is knackered because she's not slept, and she's crankier than ever...
I know Lewy Body dementia involves a bit of aggression but not sure if this is all down to dementia anyway??
He's colour has changed a bit since yesterday? He's a bit yellow, and his eyes are very red, prob due to lack of sleep?
He's had 2 of his Amoxcillin, so that should kick in soon!
But dementia...is it normal for uncontrolled gabbling????
Wits end...Mandy.xxx
Mother and Father in law both have dementia FIL is not yet as bad as MIL and I truly empathise with you
MIL says she is having a baby she is 92 FIL 96 so safe to say we very much doubt it but of course she is convinced FIL just goes from meal time to meal time watching the clock he is a bit like the grandad of that comedy programme bread" where's me dinner"
Some days MIL just screams all the time and it is difficult to get her to eat and drink and some times she beats up the carers and FIL can not watch TV as the people on the TV are real to MIL and in the room with so she shouts at them
I can't visit as much as I used to due to being in the process of divorce and having to dodge the ex to be
They are such lovely people and it is sad to see what has happened to them it is a terrible illness and tough on the family
A while ago MIL had to go into respite for a couple of weeks to give FIL a bit of a break as well as all of us and like you we used to get calls from the carers when MIL wouldn't go to bed
to say it is a hard job is an understatement and you have your mum on top of everything else there is certainly a need to have some time to yourself as you seem to be spreading yourself very thin
PM me anytime honestly. My grandad and an auntie had dementia so i also know how it affects family from the inside as well as from a nursing point of view. I also know that dementia doesn't know a 24 hour clock at all and that's one of the biggest problems. We want to sleep and they don't.
It is a very sad and cruel disease and in the first stages is very distressing to the sufferer. As time goes on this distress is less as the person is lost to the disease and the distress is to the family who are carers. What support do you have? Are you a member of any local charities for the diaease as these can be very supportive? Respite is a must for yours and you mums sanity!! Dementia is a 24/7 none stop illness which probably eventually needs nursing care.
I really do hope i've not been too blunt as this isn't my intention. I do empathise with you and you need all the support you can get. I would like to be of assistance in any way i can. I applaud you and send you love and hugs.
I've had a nap and feel a bit brighter...phew!
Scraton..that made me smile..takes some doing getting pregnant at 92!!!! But in all seriousness as you say it's hard work, and there is no let up...with Uncle H he has good days and bad day so it's not continuous, even on a good day he's 'confused' but the added problem is that he's deaf and blind, so you can't reason with him. And the bad days well..???
Mother has little patience and gets jealous when all the attention isn't on her!! Her Brain Tumour hasn't made her any kinder!!!
I've also had to dodge the ex but am now very happy with no.2!!
Jan thanks very much for your support..one of my problems with all this is that I live an hour away, so it's not all that easy to always be on hand..I've got carers going in 3xdaily... Get Uncle h up and wash n breakfast..lunch...and get ready for bed and put to bed, that's when he will actually go!!
The mac people call in to see mother about every 2/3 weeks.
I asked the doctor about respite care, but she wasn't very keen. She seemed to think that it would confuse him all the more??
She also said on the nights he won't go to bed that he's to be left downstairs because mother must go to bed and have her sleep! In the case of a fall....then so be it!!!
You haven't been blunt at all...I'm just very grateful that you know how I feel.
As jolly and happy as I usually am..it can get a bit lonely.
Much love to you both, you've been a great help to me.
Xxxx
Hope you're continuing to keep your batteries charged,rest and sleep is a must. Also some you timeout, just for yourself eh.
I think the GP sounds typically unsupportive to yours, Uncles and Mums needs, which must be very frustrating. An attitude of if he falls so be it is unnacceptable. It's an accident waiting to happen and not fair on your mum, you or the carers that would have to perhaps find him one day eh!! Push for that respite and once there he should be assessed for his needs. If he is a danger to himself or others, he needs to be kept safe.
What a bloody difficult place you'er in right now, it's a wonder you're not as mad as a hatter with it all. Ooooh I see from your status and mixing with the likes of LM, scraton and gang that you're already a loon anyway hehe :)
