So with the new year I thought I might give blogging a go! Resolutions and all... I'll start at the beginning.
In September of 2011, I noticed a black dot in the middle of a mole on my nose. Not concerned at first, I ignored it but as the months passed the dot got bigger until it completely covered up the original mole (about the size of a pencil eraser). My mother suggested I make an appointment with my gp and in December I had it checked out. My gp looked at it and said it was definitely nothing to be worried about and moles change all of the time but if I found it cosmetically displeasing, she would set up an appointment with a dermatologist. Because my mole was "cosmetic", the earliest I could see the dermatologist was 4 months away. As the months went passed, the mole grew bigger and bigger until the point where it was bigger than my eye (keep in mind this is on my nose). I finally had my appt with derm and the doctor diagnosed it as a benign lesion but referred me to a plastic surgeon to have it removed. The plastic surgeon saw me right away because he wanted to take it off before my prom (Which was coming up).
The lesion was removed and I felt like I was getting my life back. I had been feeling unbelievably self-conscious from the giant mole on my nose and removing gave me a lot more self-confidence. About 2 weeks after the removal, I went back to see the doctor for biopsy results and he told us it was a benign lesion, just as they suspected. A week later, my parents and I were called back to his office where he told us he had made a mistake and gave us someone else's biopsy results. My lesion was a 9mm melanoma.
To say this was a shock would be putting mildly. I had never had a bad sunburn on my face as my parents were diligent about sunscreen and never used tanning booths. I had always been pale but tanned easily, hardly ever burned and had dark hair and eyes. Doctors were shocked because I was so young and my tumour was so large. I was (am) a rare case.
I met with oncologists, plastic surgeons and more surgeons who told me I would need surgery to remove more of my nose to get margins to reduce the risk of recurrence. Right before my surgery, I also found out the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes in my neck. My first surgery they cut a giant hole in my nose and biopsied my neck to confirm positive lymph nodes. I then spent a week in the hospital (including my 18th birthday) recovering and then I had to undergo a 7 hour surgery to perform a forehead-flap to fix my nose and remove positive lymph nodes. I then stayed in the hospital to recover from that surgery. Nothing the doctors told me ahead of time could have prepared me for the pain and physio I would have to endure, but the worst part was having to accept my new nose. Certainly not how I thought I would be looking for prom.
After 3 months of recovering from surgery, I started my first month of interferon (a chemo-like drug) where I went to the hospital everyday for 20 days to receive it via PICC line. I had fever, chills, nausea, exhaustion, back pain and sore joints for a month. Immediately following my completion of high-dose interferon, I started radiation to the left side of my neck. I thought nothing could be worse than interferon but I was in for a horrible surprise. Radiation turned out to be way worse, every time I swallowed it felt like I was swallowing shards of glass, I had no sense of taste, I couldn't eat anything other than supplements and started having major panic attacks. I was put on morphine and anti-nausea medication, laxatives and attivan. Everyday of radiation I wanted to quit but managed to finish my 20 days.
Today I am 5 days into my 11 months of self-injections of interferon. I have to give myself a shot (well I haven't actually done it myself yet, a nurse still has to do it but I'm working towards doing it myself) 3 times a week and even though its a lower dose, it is much harder than the month of high dose. I get fever, nausea, rigours, dehydrated, exhausted, pain every where, depression and horrible panic attacks.
So thats my story! I'm hoping to try out blogging as a way of getting my feelings out so hopefully it will work out!
