Hi, its been a while since I blogged or posted, and sorry to all my friends on here for leaving it so long, I had to re-locate to mums bungalow for a while and she didnt have internet, I have missed you all and your kind and comforting words.....
Well just an update on my situation, 6 weeks ago mum was admitted to hospital, the doctors didnt think she was gonna make it through the night, a spinal compression caused by the tumour damaging her spine set things back beyond belief, October she was brave enough to get on the bus and go for a ride out, on her own, I thought she was improving, but then she fell, her legs just gave way on her, it was very upsetting as she was becoming increasingly weaker on her legs, anyway she had some spinal surgery, as without it she would become crippled and lose bladder control, the operation seemed to go OK, she came home, but then a week later she started going downhill and was admitted to hospital with dangerously high levels of potassium, she spent xmas and new year in hospital and finally came home on the 13th Jan.......
She has had to come and stay with me as she now requires 24 hour care, she can hardly walk, she is catheterized, and is gradually becoming weaker.................... its breaking my heart seeing her like this, the realization that she is now not going to get any better has finally hit, her especially, Im sat here looking at my beautiful mum, laid in a hospital bed, in my dining room, sleeping peacfully at the moment. .I feel so sorry for her, she is getting very frustrated and worrying about me, I told her not to worry, Im gonna be here always, I am doing what I do out of sheer love I wouldnt have it any other way, and of course I have my nine year old son and she is worrying about him too.........
Weve had a few problems since she came home, we were assigned a Marie Curie nurse, and I had to call her the other nite, what wonderful people, they truely are angels on earth......
So hence my title, the time I always dreaded but knew would come, is here now and what can we do but try to deal with it, things go on day to day and sometimes dont really have the time to think about the situation, but then i sit back and think for a while and the severity of all thi hits me very hard, then I try n block it out by keeping busy......
I send youall my love and hugzzzzzzz
xxxxxx
Rachael
