I started the year very positively looking forward to the imminent arrival of my new baby and I’m finishing it differently to how I expected. There has been a lot to deal with. The birth of my son, my diagnosis, the development of my prognosis, the death of a family member, the terminal development of my mother-in-law’s cancer prognosis, the birth of my new nephew and his initial struggle. It has been a wonderful and a terrible year. The image of that ghost scene still haunts me, I think it always will, but I can’t focus on that. I would never get off the couch and live my life. The point of my treatment is so that I can live, so that’s what I’m going to do. There are a lot of things that I still want to achieve in my life. I want to see my son’s grow up and finish school, maybe even graduate University. I want them to tell “I’m soooo embarrassing!” I want to reach major milestone birthdays and wedding anniversaries and go on a second honeymoon. I want to see my son’s fall in love and get married and have children of their own. I want to be the Granny that fills the Grandkids up on sugar and gingerbread biscuits before handing them back to their parents. These goals may not mean anything to anyone else, but they mean a lot to me, and I’m not giving up on them.
I am not going to say that I will not stop fighting, instead I say that I’m not going to stop.
