It's been a long time since I have written. Last week marked one year since my diagnosis.
I didn't think I would get emotional about it. I have been working hard to get 'back to normal'. I am in a new job, have been exercising more than I did pre-diagnosis energy levels are brilliant and I have been feeling great. Then smack! The 25th November hits and all the memories of that horrid day in 2020 come flooding back. When time stood still and all my worries come flooding back too. Will it return, what would I do, could I go through it all again?
As I write this I have one more chemo treatment left, or as I call it 'chemo-light'. One last go at the three-weekly herceptin and pertuzumab which I have been on since 2nd December last year 2020. It will finally mark the end of my active treatment, one year to the day since it all started. I will then have my port removed and move to the monitoring under my oncologist and surgeon to check that I remain healthy and cancer-free.
I had my first mammogram since I got the all-clear back in the spring. That was the day after my cancerversary. I think I can honestly say that I have never been more nervous in my life. Whilst my oncologist and surgeon have both examined me recently and been happy that all is well, what if the mammogram found something? I haven't had the formal results yet so still in a state of anxiety but hope that if anything was majorly untoward they would contact me sooner rather than later!?
So what have a learnt in this year? I have taken the time to read through my blog, it has made me appreciate just what my body (and mind) have been through. I guess I couldn't let myself take it all in at the time but my word what a lot! So I am choosing on this anniversary of sorts to celebrate the fact that my family and I have gotten through this and it has made us stronger. I am also so very grateful that I have made it through the other side when I know so many of my fellow sufferers have not.
Finally it has made me feel that I need to do what I can so that others are more aware of their bodies and how to check for signs and make sure that they get the help that they need. Up until now I have never been open about my diagnosis on social media or beyond my close family and friends. I wanted to shy away from the sympathy and attention it would cause. Now I am thankfully at the other end of treatment I feel differently. I should do all I can to raise awareness and help others, so I will be telling my story more widely in the hope that more will check, more will question and hopefully raise some money for fantastic organisations such as Macmillian.
I hope anyone who reads this is doing well. As ever take care xxx
