in god, for quite a number of years i considered myself agnostic, fence sitter as far as god is concerned, i want to believe but there are so many bad things in this life that i think if there is a god he must be a cruel one. i`m not just talking about personal, but the world as a whole, so after being told i had 3 to four months to live last march i did think about it again, and still of the same opinion, then at my…