Well ive always fancied the idea of blogging, so here goes, my spelling and grammar may be alot to be desired, but bear with me, i would like to voice our journey. I think if only to give me a bit of a sounding board, but also to hear from others.
I met John in Brisbane three years ago, i was travelling with a friend and it was the end of our trip. I had a amazing time and never wanted to come home. But as we all know bills to pay, work to do etc!!
When i was travelling through Byron Bay, a really hippy town, i decided to get my tarot cards read. Not a thing i would normally do but why not eh! I remember the woman, she was called Margot. She predicted i would meet some one soon, he would sweep me off my feet and would be the love of my life.... Yeah right whatever. Im the most independent person, loved dating, having fun, and partying so aspiring for a deep and meaningful was just not in my make up! We carried on backpacking and i didnt give Margot a second thought.
Our last spot to end our trip was Brisbane, it was chinese new year and the streets were vibrant party parades. It was fantastic. After a long evening of socialisng and having fun we headed back to our hostel, there was a big open air bar there and the disco night continued. There i was in the smoking area (shame on me) chatting away to other backpackers and having a drink. This Irish guy came up and started chatting away, i never thought anything of it as that is the way it is when you are a backpacker, you talk to anyone!
He was a bit different though, little did i now that he fancied the pants off me and i was going to be well and truly swept off my feet. We spent the next two days with each other, just getting to know each other, and i was preparig to head back to Sydney for my connecting flight home. I noticed a big scar on the side of his head, he told me openly about having a brain tumour and it being removed a few years previously. This didnt bother me atall, if anything i think i admired that he was open and the fact that he had had brain surgery had not stopped him from doing anything. He was travelling on his own and had left his job, friends and family back in Ireland to forfill a life ambition to see some of the world. Very brave.
John decided on the morning i was going back to Sydney to also get a flight back, he said he had more chance of finding work there as his funds were getting tight, he had already been in oz for four months and hadnt had to work yet. I was pleased i wouldnt be flying alone and was delighted he was coming with me. We stayed at the airport hotel in sydney the day before my flight out and i remember talking ALL night, he was great company and such a lovely person. I wished i could spend longer getting to know him.
The morning i flew out we exchanged numbers and e mails and promised to keep in touch, i invitied him to cardiff after his trip. But in the back of my mind i was sad as i thought of going back to my normal life. Holiday romances eh!
I returned back to the UK and within hours of getting home we were on MSN, e mail, texts etc. He was LOVELY!!! I remember on my flight, about 12 hours in to the greuling 23 hour trip i found a note he slipped into my bag without me knowing. It made me smile from ear to ear for the rest of the way home.
A week later after many conversations,John blew me away by saying.... Ive booked a flight back, can you pick me up from Heathrow on thursday (it was now tuesday). Stunned i said yes, then got off the phone and thought S***T!!! What if i dont fancy him, what if it was just a holiday thing etc etc. However, i then looked forward to meeting again. When i picked him up, i looked at his face and thats when i fell in love. We havent spent anytime apart since then, it was three years ago, we got married in March and looking back i believe Margot was right he is my soul mate.
Within the three years our life has changed ten fold, Six weeks after our wedding, John had a siezure, but the biggest yet, he was fitting for an hour and that was when i realised things were not so good now, we got told the news six weeks later the tumour had grown 20% inoperable and reffered to the oncologists for radiotherapy. And here we are now, six weeks post radiothrapy, in our first house we bought in august, a puppy who is an absoulte pain but makes us smile every day and also makes us get outside.
Its the hardest time ever, John is so tired and his speech, and memory has been seriously affected. Im Three stone heavier, as i m a binge eater under stress!! and i think rather than being the doting wife, im actually Creualla Deville at times. Patience has never been my strong point, but we are only human right? As i nurse care for others 37.5 hours a week. But then i come home, i can do that, infact i get a great sense of reward by doing it. Its another matter when its 24/7. I have not worked since august, as i dont feel its fair to be looking after others when i need to be looking after John. However im going back to work in January, and im actually looking forward to a bit of a break!!
On the lighter side, we have each other, we still absoultley dote on each other and i really really love him. Would i wish for a different deal...yes, but if it wasnt to be spent with John then no.... This is us
xxx
