This is not going to be happy or uplifting, informative of even useful but a self-centered piece of rambling - but sorrry I need to write this down.
I know how lucky I have been so far and that what I have been through is for my own good but it has ground me down. I apoligise to all of you who are in far worse situations than me I don't mean to belittle the enormity of what you have faced I can't imagine how some of…