Dec 4th, the eve of the santa dash, only 2 miles, I can always walk it so why do I feel so nervous? I had hoped to train up a bit and look comfortable but the odds seemed against that what with the frosts and my own stinking cold still i got some new running shoes ( even though I cant run! ) so maybe they will grow wings overnight and magic me over the route. No, i will plod round ( tried it yesterday in the ice and only…
Today at 2.40pm my beloved Ed passed away. It was so so peaceful and painfree that i feel happy for him. He had had enough and just couldnt fight anymore. Ed had been unable to communicate for 4 days, not even squeeze my hand but the last words he heard were me telling him I loved him and me kissing him and he just went with a sigh. Somehow I will carry on but the worst part was leaving him at the Hospice when I just…
Tuesday morning and a support system of carers to tend to Eds needs moved quickly but too quickly for Ed I think. I had got upset when I woke as I momentarily forgot the situation and then , when the reality dawned that it was not a bad dream , I broke down and cried. This upset Ed who sensed my distress and got agitated yet again and I had to get the twilight nurses to come and give yet another injection. As strangers…
Briefly, Ed went downhill over the weekend,so i ask all my friends to pray that he now finds peace as quickly as possible as he is so tired and poorly he cant be moved to the Hospice. A bumpy time with more morphine sat and then relaxant sunday which just made him comatose. I am devastated as no one told us it would happen so quickly and he cant speak now and we still had things to say, like ` I love you` for the last…
Where do I start? Last wednesday Ed went for his 2nd dose of herceptin but no tablets to take due to how poorly they made him. Thursday and friday Ed was able to eat very small portion of mash, brocolli and thin half slice of corned bef with gravy which was the first `meal` in about a month. Bowel working and friday pm went in the car a mile to the prom to see the sea. Pain patches not been upped for almost 2 weeks. Were…
