Kezzerbird, Canal...The Return part 5

1 minute read time.

 

Kev hasn’t even held my hand so far, I feel invisible most of the time. He said he thinks he is protecting himself from getting hurt. He is a cancerian and has retreated into his shell, he won’t go forwards, only sideways.

I made a promise to him last year, I said I would fight my cancers with everything I had…..I kept my promise and I am 7 months into remission, he will loose me, not because of the cancer though but because not many people get a second chance to enjoy life together,no matter the length of time that may be and he doesn’t want to know, how sad.

 

Friday 9th October 2009

We walked for two hours around the mere this morning and it was beautiful….memories of child hood sprouted, as under-foot were thousand of conkers strewn everywhere. We sat down near the shore and watched the swans preening themselves, occasionally rising from the water to stretch, majestic in form, beauty and grace. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh ‘ansome’.

Flocks of Canada geese taking to flight, forming a diamond pattern in the sunlit sky above.

Close by a tree was an overhanging branch that someone had attached a swing too, it was a rope with a branch for a seat, on one side the blue nylon rope dangled to the floor and Summit amused herself pulling on the rope.

 

 

 

 

Saturday 10th Oct

It was down the canal a short way to the turning point so we could head back to the Ellesmere Arm and the launderette due to muddy paw prints plastered across everything!

While Kev is at the launderette, Summit is asleep and I sat writing this. I can’t help wondering how Drew is after is op and how Pusspins is, what was Debs having for tea and was kate still doing well on her chemo

 

 

 

 

 

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    We all deal with 'the dirty little pig' in our own way, but some of us need more help than others to guide us in a healthy way through the ordeals thrown at us.

    So if he pulls away now he will feel less pain later, is that the thinking?

    For you Kezz...do what makes you happy.  You've earned it.

    xo

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Happiness is where you can find it,you are so right about a second chance at life,in reality this is my third,or is it 4th,5th,6th,7th,am I a cat in a previous,wanna elope with me lol........

    xPx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Thanks guys for your words and Paul we haven't been friends that long!!!!! LOL. Debs your highness you are WN royality girl...I mean Mam!!!! Maybe Crabs and Goats (me Capricorn) just don't really mix (that doesn't sound right, crabs and goats does it!).......love Carol x

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    hi Carol, i think him saying hes protecting himself is a cop out. Sounds like he hasnt got the same zest for life as you have, it also sounds like he needs to find it quick. I read a quote somewhere saying how tragic it is when someone stops living before they die.

    take care

    annax

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    My wife quoted that one about stopping living before you die, I deserved it, I was a real 'miserable git' I saw the light and now, barring the odd 'black moment' am back in the land of the living.

    It's sights like the one in your last photograph that make it all worthwhile. Beautifull!!!!

    Fight on lass, if he is'nt listening, MAKE HIM !!

    Big Hugs, love Bill xxx