Thanks to everyone for your kind wishes for my partner. The operation did not go as well as hoped. They removed two more cancers from his neck but in the process they had to remove the nerve which works the bit of tongue he has left. So now he cant speak or swallow and to add insult to injury they couldnt do anything about his jaw not opening. My partner is now in a worse state than he was before this second operation. He is so angry...........the look in his eyes is too awful to bear. At my wits end and dont know what to do......... any suggestions please. Anyone had the same or similar?????????
I have read some very sad news on here tonight from others and i send all of you my love and thoughts xxxxxx
FormerMember
Oh sweetheart, I'm sorry I have no experience of this and no suggestions apart from shooting the surgeon!!! I can't imagine how you are both feeling and coping, you expect an operation to have a positive outcome, to improve the situation - even a little bit - not make it bloody worse otherwise why put your husband and you through it.
You are both right to be angry and in your position I would want a very to the point meeting with the surgeon to get some answers, did they warn of this outcome, if not why; can anything else be done and if so at what risk.
Can't really add anything to what carolb has said but just wanted to send you both a hug and hope that the surgeons will be able to come up with something that will be of help.
Oh Kathryn, how awful when you were feeling so hopeful about it. I bet he's angry! He has every right to be. But better to be angry than to lie down and whimper about it I guess. Sorry, I have no helpful suggestions about this. You just have to keep on loving him and holding his hand and finding things that he can enjoy. What about a nice relaxing foot massage with essential oils for starters?
This sounds truly awful, horrendous in fact. I wish I could say something that would offer you some sort of help, but I feel useless. Surely there must be something they can do about the jaw problem??
It must be heartbreaking for you to have to watch too. I do hope you get some answers that you are both looking for xx
This is a truly heart-breaking situation for you to be in, and it must be terrible for your partner to be unable to vocalise. What exactly did the surgeon say about the operation beforehand? Did they mention this as a possibility on the consent form? I really hope that they can do something to help your partner. As others have said, anger is probably a lot better than despair. Sending you hugs xxxx Penny
