small cell lung cancer, chemo or not?

Hi Jules

welcome to this site but so sorry for the reason that brings you here.

My mum aged 77 was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer in July 2009 and died in November 2009.  She was offered chemo but also told that because of the advanced stage of her cancer that it would only make a difference of about 6 weeks to her life.  Mum decides against it as at that stage she was feeling pretty well and like your mum was worried about the sickness and hair loss.  She had a few good weeks and i was able to take her on holiday to Portugal.  I think the decision to have or not have chemo is a very personal decision but i feel that the persons age does play a large part in that decision - maybe the need to fight for life isn't as strong as in a younger person.

Cancer is a terrible illness and it changes your life for ever.  All I can say is enjoy all the time you can with your mum while she is able  - sometimes the speed of this illness can take you by surprise - i don't say this to frighten you  - its just although i knew my mums prognoses was 3-6 months I still kept on thinking I would have time to do and say things i now wish I had.

Take one day at a time. My thoughts are with you

Joan xx

Hi Joan, thankyou for your reply, so sorry for your loss, how on earth do we get through this? Even at my age I dont feel any near ready to say goodbye, I certainly intend to pack as much into the time mum has left as I possibly can without wearing her out too much,I have to say, the people who use this site are the bravest, most compassionate people I have ever come across, its a shame we have all come to meet in such a dreadful way, Let's hope that one day a cure WILL be found. Take care Julie x

Hello Julie,

My mum is 64 and was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer in the Autumn. She was told she had weeks to live without chemo, and 9 months ish if she decided to have chemo. It was such a shock prognosis (she was so well and ful of life) that even though she was dreading it she took the chemo option 'to give us time to get our heads around it' (as if that will ever happen!) and we had a few months of good quality time with her, and a lovely if bittersweet Christmas. However, in the new year the chemo started to take its toll so was stopped early and she now has weeks left :( I agree it is such a personal choice I'm so grateful we could treausre her for a bit longer but the horrible inevitablity of what was going to happen once the chemo stopped as been very hard for mum and all the family, so there are pros and cons even if the chemo works well. I also dont feel anywhere near ready to say goodbye- I'm in my late twenties and cant imagine all the years ahead without her in them. However, one thing that bizarrely comforts me is 'there's nothing I can do about it'. So cherish your mum and enjoy the time as much as possible, will be thinking of you too xxx

Thankyou Alice, I certainly do cherish every moment we have together, It's the not knowing isn't it?  I can see mum's point of view that she doesn't want to feel any worse than she already does and every one she has spoken to (including her docs) has told her that it CAN make her really poorly and she WILL lose her hair ( her crowning glory), but on the other hand it MAY buy her more time, (no guarantees), Mum helped her best friend nurse her husband with cancer just over ayear ago, he had chemo, but had such a bad reaction to it that it was stopped by the oncolgist, he only lived for 10 weeks after diagnosis, Mum feels she is not prepared to put herself through that sickness and lack of energy for the sake of maybe a few more weeks, I totally respect her decision but at the same time want to scream "what about me?"  I feel so very selfish right now, I wish I could wake from this b****y nightmare. xx

Well its been almost a month since my last blog and mum did change her mind and have chemo, She HAS lost her hair and is now regretting her to decision to go ahead with the treatment. To make matters worse, mum went for her pre chemo blood test on Tues only to be told that her white cells are too low and so chemo has had to be postponed for the time being.

She is so very tired and having regular bouts of quite severe pain,(eased a bit by her oramorph), I think she is giving up the fight now, the deterioration is devastating, Just wish I could make all this disappear! How dare this disease take hold of my mum! Felling pretty low and angry right now.

Can't bare to see her going through this anymore!

How do any of us cope?

Jules x