I havent been on here for ages. I used this site alot just after my mum died.. but now 2 years on i find myself back on here, because i am really really struggling right now.. I keep on getting told to get on with my life, that im lucky, i should be over my mum now.. and so thats what i pretend to do...but i need her, really, really, really need her. I need her guidance, her love, i cant put it into words, but im finding it increasingly hard to live with out her. Since she died i have lost so much confidence, i was never overly confident when she was alive, but she boosted me, she gave me self worth, she encouraged me, believed in me, and boosted my self confidence.. And now im gradually loosing more and more confidence. I feel so alone, i just want some one to help me, to guide me, to love me like my mum did. She was 19 when i died, i know i was lucky to have her for 19 years..but now im 21 and the serious issue in live have arisen... its now i really really need her..
I used to be close to my mums family, but its not the same, my dad and mums parents dont get on, and my nan always criticises my dad and my family.. my dad wants to move away which is going to cause massive issues..
I dont know the point of this blog.. just thought writing it down to people who may have a vague idea might help.
thanks for listening x
