I finish radiation and chemo on tuesday and then wait 3 months before all the scans are done to see how successful treatment has been. While I look forward to ending treatment and not having to spend all my time at the hospital, I know this will be a very anxious time. What if it hasn't worked? How will I feel if I have to go through it all again? Am I strong enough to face that? It has been an ordeal., If anything it has been more of an emotional strain than a physical one. Having spent much of it in hospital away from my beloved pets and bored out of my scull. The constant waiting around for appointmentments desperate to just be at home. The rollercoaster of emotional ups and downs. The violent swings in mood. It has been a strain and I don't know that I would be strong enough to face it all over again. I want to enjoy the next 3 months as much as possible and I know I must try not to let my fears spoil it. I must learn to go with the flow a little more and accept that some things simply are beyond my control.
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