I'm scared about what the future holds....my partner is waiting to have an MRI scan which will decide whether she needs a lumpectomy or a mastectomy. Although she appears on the outside to be taking it all in her stride, I'm really worried about the long term impact for her, especially if she needs more major surgery. I would like to hear from anyone who's been through this, especially from those who's partners have had surgery about how they have coped and supported their loved one through this ordeal. I am not natually good at "being strong" but am trying to stay strong for her and the kids. Be pleased to hear from you....
FormerMember
Hi Graham
I have had a lumpectomy for breast cancer . The lab results showed I didn't have clear margins , they said they were going to do another operation to shave away some tissue to try and get clear margins . If that didn't work I was told I would have to have a mastectomy but I managed to persuade the surgeon to do a third cavity shave if necessary and possible.
Luckily clear margins were achieved at the second attempt and I am now having raiotherapy treatmen.
When I was told I had cancer I burst into tears and was very shocked and scared. But as time went on it got easier and I accepted it. You tend to get good days and bad days.
If you go on the Breast cancer care web site you can download their info pamphlets and they have one for partners . I gave my husband a copy and he thought a lot was very relevant. You may find it very helpful.
I wish you both all the very best and I hope your partners treatment goes well.
If she ever needs advice or cheering up the chat site on here can be good for a laugh. It certainly cheered me up on dark days .
Hi Graham, I have gone through same situation as Veggie, my radiotherapy treatment finished back in August, and I am now on Arimidex..yes it is very scary, the waiting for results gets !!! to you...my husband and family found it very hard dealing with it, but they have had more time to get used to it...good luck ...keep in touch, there are a lot of good people on this site that you can chat to, if you do not understand some of the procedures etc....x
Hi Graham - I don't have the same type of cancer as your partner, but just wanted to say good luck to both of you. A lot of people I've been in contact with have been very calm, including myself after a stormy couple of weeks following diagnosis, so she may have reached her own wee place where she's found a measure of peace and calm. Let's hope so, eh? Hold on tight to one another, with lots of love kate xxxxxxxxxxx
I agree with the others - the waiting for results and a definitive diagnosis is horrible. You want to/need to KNOW YOUR ENEMY! It certainly helped me to understand my condition and I read everything in sight. There is a booklet especially for carers available and I'm sure if you post a question to 'Ask a nurse' in blue on the top right of your Home page they will point you in the right direction.
