I am sitting typing this cosied up on the sofa with Rocky after having walked the little blighter in what felt like -20C. What a wuss I am! It wasn't of course but there was a heck of biting wind blowing against us. Good job we treated Rocky to a new coat which he got early rather than at Christmas!
The last month has been very strange in lots of ways. Lots of ups and downs and people not really knowing what to do or say or act! I'm feeling in limbo as I'm trying so hard to be fair and kind and do and say the right thing all the time to everybody and seem to fail miserably at every turn!
Paul was home from Dubai the week Gordy had his scan. "What a great bloke he is coming home to support Gordy at such a difficult time" was heard from many quarters. I kept my big gob shut and didn't tell them that the only reason he was actually in the country was because his mate from Oz had come to England for a family wedding and they spent the week getting ratted out of their brains! To be fair he did go with Gordy for the scan and the results! But then again once they realised Gordy had got himself a mobility car they used him as an unpaid taxi running them here there and everywhere because he doesn't drink anymore. He was exhausted by the time they left!
It seems the chemo has shrunk the cancer in Gordy's pancreas a bit but there are still a lot of lesions in his liver. They told him that they will finish the course of chemo (another 3 sessions) and then there is nothing more they can do and they expect the cancers to grow again as soon as the chemo stops. They can't give him radiotherapy on his liver as they are not sure what is good tissue and what is not. This sent him on a massive downer and he was in total shock. The trouble is I think he was hoping they could do more as the chemo has been so beneficial, kick starting his liver and so on but now it's hit home that he is not going to beat it and he just can't get it out of his head. Mumsy and me and tried our best to get him to enjoy the time he has left but nothing we say or do seems to make any difference. This makes us feel even worse because we feel absolutely useless.
Some of Gordy's mates put together and bought him a PS3 which he had been hankering after for ages but kept putting off buying which was a cracking thing to do. We do know some lovely people.
We all went to watch Alex, Gordy's daughter, take her baby boy to swimming classes the other week. Zain absolutely loves it and I think it's a great idea getting them used to water and swimming so young being a really poor swimmer myself and absolutely terrified of going out of my depth!
I went for my appointment with the Musculoskeletal specialist and she has given me arm clasps for my 'chronic epycondilitis' and exercises to do which I'm stuggling a bit with. My GP has also finally diagnosed me with Vitamin D deficiency after going backwards and forwards with chronic joint pain for the last six years. My sister-in-law Alma gave my Mam and our Dougy apoplexy when she told them that's how her M.S. started! It took me ages to calm Mumsy down finally convincing her that it is a very common problem due to the lack of sunshine in this country and my aversion to it when it does show it's face!!! Hopefully the Vitamin D supplement will get rid of some of these aches and pains and I'll have a bit more energy!
I've been a very naughty girl though and shampood Mumsy's carpets and my own which has hurt my arms and hands quite a lot even though I did wear the arm clasps. Of course i followed that up with putting up the Christmas decs in both our homes which has only exascerbated the problem but I am going to rest up for a couple of days before 'crazy cake decorating time' descends upon me. I am so grateful that LM, Ems and Hilary are probably occupying the naughty step and there will be no room for my huge derriere! LOL!
We had a lovely family get together on 1st December for Dougy's birthday. I made the traditional chocolate truffle cake which they all love so much. I personally think it's far too sickly but each to their own! Gordy was a little distant and stayed in the background a lot but I think he was a bit tired. We let off the fireworks that didn't get done on 5th November and Dougy was driving my nieces nuts by holding the kids hands to light some of them. He was really careful with them though and each time one of the kids lit one they had a race back to the 'safety line' which had us all in fits! My great-nephew Dylan (Dougy's grandson) has finally been blessed with his family nickname - Chunky! We all have nick-names and rarely if ever do our real names get used by anyone in the family!
Mumsy has had a well earned break this weekend because Gordy went down to Bristol, partly to see all his workmates and partly because The Boro were playing Bristol City! The Boro won which made the trek worthwhile as Gordy will have spent the rest of the weekend torturing his bosses! I hope that the short break has done him good. It's certainly done Mumsy good as she has been able to relax and have Rocky there with her while Gordy has been away. Mumsy is now out on a bingo trip to Leeds with Aunty Joyce and as I said earlier, Rocky and me are curled up on the sofa all cosy and warm.
I am now going to catch up on everybody's blogs and posts to find out how you all are and what you have been up to.
Massive hugs and much love to you all,
Nin xxxxx
